| With our unique ability to remember many past events, as intelligent human beings we misuse this gift. We often assign too much importance to the past. A constant review of hurtful or distressing past situations gives us the feeling of victim. |  |
Without exception they add to our feelings of inadequacy and/or guilt. We give up a portion of our inner direction and control. We become vulnerable to the idea of outside influences over us. This chips away at the self-esteem we do possess. |
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We all have incidents from the past that
we may remember as being painful. In reality the event was not painful
inherently. It is only as painful as we decide it is. What is worse is that
if we keep dwelling on them, they grow in force. It is like feeding a fire.
To change our feelings about a certain
time, we need to reverse the process by reviewing that period and focusing
on only its positive aspects.The worse the picture we paint of
ourselves, the less we feel that we deserve anyone else's love. If past events still influence us, it is not because they must, but because we choose to let them. |
