The interview is with Maria Todd, a KRBE morning show host.

(M) Maria Todd

(J) John Rzeznik

***********

(J) Maria?

(M) Good morning. Johnny Rzeznik! I can't believe I'm talking to you. There are so many women that just wish they were me right now.

(J) (laughing) Why do you make alot of money?

(M) Um, no, just cuz I'm talking to you...ok, well

(J) Oh, oh, oh, OK

(M) Well, there is that money thing but don't spread that around.

(J) Oh, OK. I get it.

(M) Actually, we have gotten more e-mails and faxes of people that say they are going to fly from different areas of the country to come and see you guys at our Earth Day Festival.

(J) At the Earth Day Festival?

(M) Yes...on April 1st. They say that...This one woman wrote and said, well, we are a bunch of goobers; is what they are calling themselves.

(J) Oh, gosh. (with a giggle)

(M)They've given themselves the name. Yes, your legions.

(J) Um yes, my minions.

(John and Maria both laugh)

(M) So they are all siked to come and see you. So where are you calling from?

(J) I'm calling from Cape Town, South Africa.

(M) What's the time difference over there?

(J) Um, let's see, well... To Los Angeles it's 10 hours ahead. 10 hours ahead of Los Angeles, 7 hours ahead... You guys are on Central time right?

(M) Right.

(J) So yeah, 8 hours; you guys are 8 hours behind me.

(M) Good gracious! Are you guys doing a show over there?

(J) Yeah, actually we're playing with, um, Lenny Kravitz and, um, The Cult. (Laughing) Believe it or not.

(M) Good Lord!

(J) I know, it's kinda weird.

(Maria laughs)

(J) But, but, but, you know, it's cool. It's been really wild. I mean we've been playing in big stadiums, and its really cool.

(M) What's the thing you like best about the job?

(J) About my job?

(M) Yeah

J) Gosh, I, I think, you know, the fact, the fact that you can... Well it's 2 things. One, I don't have a boss I gotta answer to, you know. Which, which just... I was really bad at having a boss. You know? I mean, I have people I have to, I have to deal with but I don't really have to, like, nobody's my boss. So that's cool. And I think the 2nd thing is that you're able to, I don't know, you're able to do something really cool, on a big scale for people. You know, you can actually do something, you can use your position as kinda like a bullypulpit** to um, make people aware of certain things. You know?

(M) What gets on your nerves about it?

(J) Oh, my God... ok, I'll tell you exactly what gets on my nerves about it. Um, about touring, the repetition of it. You know? And then, and then, um, I'd have to say when people say (In a mocking tone of voice) "Where'd you get your name?" You know? (laughing) I hate that one. And then, um, and then um... When people want to hang out with you because your in a band. That, like, really annoys the piss out of me.

(M) ok straight ques...(John interrupts)

(J) Can you say piss in Houston, on the radio?

(M) You can say that.

(J) OK

(M) Yeah, that's fine. I'll just strike my next question of, Where'd you get your name? And, like, can I hang out with you when you come to town, um... (John starts laughing about 1/2 way through her comment. Maria finishes the comment and starts laughing with him)

(M) I was watching you on, The List, on VH-1. I had never watched that show before and you were hosting that day. You did a good job, by the way, but, um, you had a pretty interesting combination of people. It was you, you had Montel Jordan, Jody Whatley...

(J) Yeah

(M) Um, I can't remem... (John interrupts)

(J) Punky Brewster

(M) I did not know, cause I tuned in late, so I never knew who that was. I'm, like, who is that woman? She looks familiar, but who is she?

(J) Soliel Moon Frye

(M) Is that who that was?

(J) Yeah, that's Punky Brewster.

(M) Now did, like... Were you a big fan of hers when she was, like, on that show?

(J) I don't think I've ever seen Punky Brewster. You know? I don't know what the hell it is. I know she was supposed to be like some really, I don't know, some kind of kid star, or something. I was like whatever.

(M) So now, I don't feel so bad either now, that I was watching it, like, who is that?

(J)Yeah, No, I had no idea. You know? But, um, it was pretty, it was weird doing that. You know, I hosted it for a whole week, so it was kinda... Like, I did 5 shows.

(M) Yeah

(J) And um, I had, um, Jeff Conaway, the guy from Taxi.

(M) Right

(J) He was on. He was COMPLETELY out of his mind.

(M) I was gonna say, nobody's seen him in, like, I don't know, a decade.

(J) Yeah, it was pretty bizarre. He was a REALLY bizarre character. And, um, Sherilyn Fenn was on there.

(M) Oh, she's pretty

(J) Oh, my God! She was killing me. You know? She was so hot, it, it was frightening.

(M) So now, you're gonna be back in the single dating pool again soon.

(J) What do you mean? (Holding in a laugh that finally comes out)

(M) Well, when I talked to you, you told me that you and your wife were separated.

(J) (sadly) Oh, yeah, yeah

(M) Possibly gonna break up?!

(J) Um, well, it kinda looks that way but, um, you know, but, but we're still cool to each other so...

(M) Well, that's good.

(J) yeah

(M) Ok, so maybe we shouldn't talk about any of that stuff. Why don't I just move passed that then? (John laughs)

(M) I'll just ask you about, like, groupies on the road. Like, what's the wildest thing that's ever happened? Anybody ever throw you, hotel room keys, underwear, naked pictures?

(J) Yeah, Yeah. All that stuff.

(M) Do you save it? Do you... What do you do with it?

(J) No, it's, I mean, you know, it's nice, it's flattering. You know, but, um, the one thought, in the back of my mind is, well, you know, she probably did this, last week, to KORN.

(John and Maria both laugh really hard about this)

(J) So then, I go, um, no way. But, um, but it's nice, it is, it's flattering, you know and, and um, you know. But I don't think it's very healthy or wise to, to um, take part in alot of that kind of nonsense. I'm boring!

(M) Well, I don't know, you got this sexy vibe going on. Would you ever capitalize on that, you know, and pose for, like, Playgirl?

(This question tickles John)

(J) No. I don't want to expose myself to the world for my shortcomings.

(M) No! We'll give you a really big leaf!

(J) (laughing hard) Yeah, I'll be like Burt Reynolds. I'll just, you know, um... (kind of clears his throat) Nah, I'd never do anything like that. That's tacky! You know? But, um... I don't know, it's funny, it's funny. I, I, cuz I don't think of myself like that so...

(M) Ok. Where do you see yourself on the career span? Like, being, like, wild and hot, like, for a few years and then gettin' out of the biz. Settling down. Like, taking all your millions (John laughs) and moving up in Montana somewhere? Or, like, Mick Jagger, still touring when your 60.

(J) I don't think they build machines like Mick Jagger anymore. You know? I really don't. I, I think that the life expectancy of a, a pop musician, or whatever, is really, really short. I mean, but, you know. I'm, I'm a song writer and I'll probably be writing songs. I'll be writing songs before, I mean, I mean, after I can't do this anymore. Cuz, I mean, it's like, you know? Rock-n-Roll is it's, it's, you know, it's a young man's game. So... Sometimes I, I, sometimes, I start to feel the fact that I'm in my 30's already. You know, where I'm just sort of like (pause) um... I'll hear something and I'll just be like, this doesn't make any sense to me. But, you know? I just want to write good songs. I think if I continue to write good songs, I'll do ok. But, I don't see myself doing this in (pause) 10 years. Not at all.

(M) Think you would ever want to do movies?

(J) Like, be an actor?

(M) Yeah

(J) Um, you know what? I got a bunch of offers to do that and I'm... I don't know, I don't know, you know? Something about musicians that turn into actors, bugs me. (John giggles) You know? It's um... But if I got to play somebody, like, really cool or something. I'd do it. Yeah, I think so. I don't know.

(M) We have something in common. We were both born and raised in Buffalo.

(J) Yeah

(M) So, I want to ask you... What is your fondest memory of growing up there?

(J) My fondest memory of growing up there. (pause) hmmmm It was the summertime, every summer and when, it would be so hot and so humid and then the sun would go down and then you could see the lightening coming and, um, it would get really windy, but the wind was really hot. And, then it would start to lightening and then, and then it would come in and it would just pour and thunder and lightening, like, unbelievable. You know? And, I miss that cuz, I spend most of my time in Los Angeles now, and, and it either A) doesn't rain or B) it just piddles all day. And it's really, you know, but, like, you know?

(M) Yeah, like it...(John starts talking)

(J) We used to get amazing thunderstroms there. You know?

(M) We used to sit on the porch, my whole family, and watch those thunderstorms. Watch them come in and watch the lightening.

(J) Yeah, (pause) Love that.

(M) and see who got scared first and ran in the house.

(J) What's your fondest memory there?

(M) Did you ever get drunk and go make snow angels?

(J) (giggles) yeah, yeah As a matter-of-fact, I have done that. (Maria's laughing) You know? But, we always turned them into snow devils.

(M) oh, gosh STOP (laughing)

(J) And um...(laughing)

(M) That's like always my big, I mean, not that I was drinking when I was like 10 or something, but, of growing up there. I kinda miss, like, getting all toasted and then going outside and totally wrecking your buzz, by falling face first, in the snow.

(J) Yeah, yeah. That's, that's a good thing. Or the other nice thing is you get really, really drunk and, and then you write your name in the snow.

(M) (laughing) Well, I couldn't do that! I was anatomically challenged in that respect.

(J) (laughing) Anatomically challenged. (John and Maria are both laughing about this)

(J) Yeah, but

(M) Back to that leaf again.

(J) (still laughing) You could try it. You know? At least, it's worth a try.

(M) Let me ask you one more thing. You guys have played Houston before. You lookin' forward to coming back?

(J) Yeah, I like Houston, alot. I like Houston alot. It's a really cool city. Although, although, um, like, trying to get to and from the airport is, like, a nightmare. Like, it's, like, this secret place, where people come and go. (John and Maria are laughing) I had to pick up a friend of mine, at the airport, the last time I was there. And, like, I was, like, lost for hours trying to find the airport. I'm, like, on the Jack Handy parkway, or whatever it was... (laughing) Like I was so lost. It was unbelievable.

(M) Well, I promise, we will pick you up this time. So you won't have that problem. And, we'll pick up your friend and we will see you at the show.

(J) Yeah, yeah. I think it's gonna be a good time. Um, I hope everybody comes out and has alot of fun.

(M) I'll renew our acquaintance, again, from the Grammy's. I'll remind you again...Hey, I'm that black chick that talked to you...(John interrupts her)

(J) I'm sorry I fell asleep. Don't take it personally (laughing)

(M) No, it's ok. Alot of people fell asleep during that broadcast.

(J) God, I was so tired. I just laid down on that couch and I was, like, I don't care. I'm taking a nap. (laughing) (John and Maria are both laughing)

(M) That's ok. We drank around you. Ate around you. I think some one put a plate on your belly, at one point.

(J) Oh, that's ok. Was I snoring?

(M) No. Not really loud.

(J) Oh, ok. That's good.

(M) There were no curtains. So it was ok.

(J) (laughing) OH, ok. That's cool.

(M) Johnny Rzeznik of the Goo Goo Dolls. Thank you so much, man.

(J) Alright. You take care of yourself. I'll see you soon.

(M) Alright. April 1st