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Speculations are rife about the new plans from Tony Blair's Labour government to instigate a complete police state. The fears arose from a speech by the Home Secretary, Jack Straw.
In this speech he outlined new cost-cutting plans for the country. People would be confined to their houses which will be fitted with terminals to work and socialise. These can also be used to scan controversial messages on screen. The systems will be supplied by Microsoft.
Another new measure will be to imprison anyone who is suspected of committing a crime to their bedroom without food or water for five weeks, if the survive they are free to carry on as normal.
Beneficiaries
The benefits are that there is no need for shops, public transport, community policing or mental institutes. Old people will be terminated as soon as they start reminiscing about the war, as will be people who lampoon Mr or Mrs Blair.
Critics were not available to comment as they had all been rounded up, shot and dumped in a mass grave outside Hemel Hempstead.
Current predictions indicate that freedom will be totally abolished by January and the notion of freedom will be completely erased from people's memory by the turn of the century.
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