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Born Josif Djugashivili, later Stalin. He was induced in 1879 by satanic worshippers, protected by his evil subjects until he was 6. Then he was told of his identity, and he said to them "I know of my heritage, I know who I am: The very Devil himself." This must be proof of his demonic influences since he has strung a complete sentence together, I couldn't even do that at twelve. He changed his name to Stalin, a deliberate corruption of Satan. After all, school can be bad enough without having to go through it with a name like Satan.
More AntiChrists Per Pound His rise to power is a matter of history, filled with dirty deeds and backstabbing, (and a liberal dose of head smashing, shootings, mass burnings and... well you get the picture) and in 1947, during his search for the ultimate weapon of his power, the A-bomb, he was attacked. The US government, using high speed test planes, (one crashed in Mexico, but that's another story) discovered that the Kremlin was being used to worship the devil. Inspired by their discovery about 'the commie bastards', they set about with zeal to infiltrate the USSR (United States of Satan's Republic). They discovery went way beyond their original projections; Stalin didn't support the Devil, he was the Devil. The US decided that the only way to stop him would be to assemble a group of religious fanatics in the marines and send them in. Armed with only their bibles and holy water they were defeated by Stalins' demons who roosted on the Kremlin, but not before on of the poisoned Stalin's afternoon tea. He was diagnosed by his doctor, Dr. Molotovski, as having terminal stomach ulcers. Stalin, at sixty-seven, knew he must have children who could carry on his work. So he locked himself in his room, much to the distress of Dr. Molotrotskytovski, and impregnated himself.
Non-standard Deviation "And I saw heaven standing open, and there before me was a white horse." Revelations, 19.11. Although that's got nothing to do with Stalin. I don't know why I mentioned it. Sorry. On the sixth of June, Stalin, by caesarean section, gave birth to six babies. Six children on the sixth of the sixth. 666, the number of the beast, the number of man. These children were sent to the six corners of the hexagon of the USSR. Here they presided over parts of the empire. These famous men were the very devils of their age. The six AntiChrists. The first child of the fallen angel: Erich Honecker, president of East Germany, 1976 to 1989. The fall of East Germany was the result of Honecker's death at the hands of George Bush. He sent America's finest Gospel Preachers to exorcise the AntiChrist. He was driven from this astral plane, his power dissolved, though he was not the first to perish. The second child of Satan: Ho Chi Minh, his mission: to subjugate Vietnam. The Americans, keen to destroy the satanic threat, launched a massive offensive. The Vietnam War. Though seemingly they lost the war, and we all know how much they hate losing, they cannot tell the truth. This truth is that a group of commandos infiltrated Ho Chi Minh's bunker complex and suicidally flooded it in holy water. After this American troops were slowly withdrawn.
Third Time Seriously Unlucky The third devil child: Fidel Castro, after converting the Cubans, was almost destroy in the Cuban Missile crisis in '62, though Khruschev was able to rescue his brother. Fidel Castro is still at large. The fourth AntiChrist is a bit of a lose cannon, not condoned by the rest of the family at all. This is the infamous Bruce Forsyth. He rebelled against his father's ideals and set himself up as popular entertainer, though not a very good one.
Two Not So Good Men The fifth and sixth sons of the Devil were to rule from Moscow in succession, so the fifth AntiChrist, Boris Yeltsin, was put into stasis for a few years, and when the his brother, Nikita Khruschev, died he was able to take his place. Khruschev was killed when he accidentally overdosed on virginal blood during an offering to his Father. Documents leaked to Dystopian Society, by a remarkably well informed source, indicate that Boris Yeltsin's failing health is due to him watching The Exorcist whilst pissed on a plane journey. We can't tell which one, because, well... he's always pissed on a plane. And everywhere else.
Arse Up This leaves just the rebellious Bruce and his brother Fidel left from the USSR's First Round of AntiChrists. Although both of these have at least on foot in the grave who knows what dark offspring have leapt from their loins in the past fifty years.
Remember, the truth is out there…
Or something.
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