Do you ever hallucinate?

Never.

Only after taking illegal drugs.

At least once a week.

Hourly, but the lamp says not to tell you that.

Are you on any medication currently. 

No, but please get me some soon! 

Yes, stuff to make me not so depressed.

Yes, stuff to make me not so happy all the time. 

Yes, stuff to make the lamp stop talking to me. 

Do you experience headaches?

Occasionally. 

Only while thinking.

Only while breathing.

Only when the munchkins appear and hammer on my head.

Yes. But than I get off work for the day.

What answer best fits your social life?

I don't have a social life.

My social life exists solely on the internet.

I hate people, why would I have a social life?

I am a party animal.

How long have you been experiencing these problems?

Since birth.

Since I was three, and my parents dropped my on my head. Fifteen times.

Just since I had to start working for a living.

Since the thought occurred to me that I might be insane.

Within the last hour, when I arrived at Stat's website.

Do you think you are insane?

I prefer the term "reality-challenged".

No.

No, but my pets do. They so so all the time.

If you were an animal, what animal would you be?

A loon.

A hyena.

What kind of questions is this? I refuse to answer.

A lamp.

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