Q. What about confidentiality on this site?
A. Please rest assured that your confidentiality will be maintained, as this site is aimed at genuinely helping 'closeted' MSM and WSW people like you lead 'happy' lives :-) For full details, please read the Privacy Policy .
Q. What does it mean to have a 'marriage-of-convenience' with a MSM (Man who has Sex with Men) or WSW (Woman who has Sex with Women)?
A. It means that you are entering into a marriage knowing that your 'spouse' is attracted to members of his/her own sex, and will probably not like to have sex with you.
Q. Why would I undergo such a marriage ?
A. If you can't enter into a 'regular' marriage for some reason. Like if you are under pressure to get married and do not want to raise a family. Or you also like to have sex with members of the same sex. Or you are in a relationship with someone your family does not approve of, and they are pressurizing you into marrying someone of their choice. By having a marriage-of-convenience with a MSM / WSW person, you can continue your relationship even after the 'marriage', thus satisfying both your parents' demands and your needs.
Q. How can I ensure that such a 'marriage' is successful for me ?
A. It depends on how badly you need such a marital arrangement. Working out such an arrangement requires extra patience, effort and understanding on your part. Most people who are trying for such an arrangement are cautious in their approach as they are not sure how this whole process works. So please be patient and persistent while corresponding with a potential spouse. Maintain truthfulness and honesty throughout the entire correspondence. Try to understand his/her needs and see if you can fulfill them. Fully explain to him/her your needs and expectations from the 'marriage'. Explain your strengths and weaknesses truthfully and try to understand those of your potential 'partner'. Don't rush into the correspondence. Do not be too restrictive about the requirements of your potential partner. Do not be too demanding of him/her. Do not give up the correspondence easily. If the other person stops writing for some time, it may be because he/she needs more time to evaluate your suitability for marriage. Wait for some time and then write to him/her again asking if he/she is still interested in corresponding with you. The other person will surely respond if you are persistent. If you invest ample time and effort in choosing a partner you can be friends with, then you will find that you will have more happiness and independence in your life with this 'marriage' than most people find in a regular marriage.
Q. How do I go about having children in such a marriage ?
A. If you and your partner choose not to consummate the marriage and yet want to have children, you can go in for artificial insemination.
Q. How do I ensure that my partner is disease-free ?
A. If communication between you and your prospective partner progresses well, then at a later stage both of you can mutually agree to undergo tests for diseases, before entering into the 'marriage'.
Q. How do I avoid getting conned by my partner in such a 'marriage' ?
A. It is advisable to draw up something like a pre-nuptial agreement with your prospective partner specifying each partner's claims and liabilities in the event of a separation.
Q. Would such a pre-nuptial agreement be legally valid ?
A. If your marriage comes under the purview of a 'contract' in your area, community or religion, then it would be legally valid. For this, it would be necessary to take your lawyer into confidence about the true nature of your 'marriage'.
Q. Has this 'marriage' worked for someone?
A. This is a new and experimental concept. Not many people are aware of it or fully understand it, so nobody has been able to enter into a marriage of convenience yet. But many people are trying. You can ensure that it works for you by following the guidelines given above.
Q. How long can I expect the whole process of finalizing a marriage of convenience to take ?
A. It can take upto 1 year for such a marriage of convenience to be finalized. So please be patient and persistent.
Please submit all questions and comments to mchandra@hotmail.com
