 This is the Integra part of a special Hellsing series created for Valentines ... click here for Alucard's version We R BB –
     Thanks to Val for help with the blog's code. Dry your tears milady Call on me if you need I will be your comfort, Oh my love, remember me ...
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Saturday Explorer has died on me ... everything looks a little skewed in Netscape and for a minute I couldn't read a single pitas blog. Need to get travel details, eg. booking of cabs and trains settled but some of these pages don't work in Netscape ... pah!!! Pahhh again ... need new compy, oohh, I forgot, I'm clean broke *sigh*. Yeah Leareth, Hellsing would be good but how do I pick it up from you? And if I were a Fellowship actor, I'll be him, taken from Wingy's blog. And I don't really know what this is but it looked really cool on Leareth's blog. I just can't play it until I get to an internet cafe since Explorer is so NOT loading on my sis' imac now. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Hiieee ... I'm back. I was at a chalet. My friends and I were supposed to be chilling out at Pasir Ris this Good Friday weekend until tomorrow morning. I even woke up early on Fri to get the chalet and errands done, unfortunately, our bosses have decided otherwise. Sooo, effectively you have my friends coming down late afternoon yesterday and then "deserting" me (the only unemployed lawyer at the moment) after dinner yesterday nite with only Sooks returning dinner tonite (Bel is effectively stuck in the office until Monday coz her bosses decided this morning that she has to redo a lot of files coz they made some changes no one bothered telling her until this morning, to be finished by Monday). Anyhow, as I want to attend Easter service and as it is no fun being at a chalet alone at nite with your shadow as company, I've called it quits. I'm not upset just feeling that this whole thingee was wasted. And no, I can't get my money back *sigh* ... what a waste of a perfectly good opportunity. Actually, March and April is such a bad time for us ... one reason why I'm doing Europe on my own with my mum and dad. It was a strange feeling being at a chalet alone by oneself in the morning. You're walking around alone while everyone is with family and friends ... it almost feels like you've been deserted. And no, even with an avid imagination, one can't help but feeling utterly and absolutely alone (where the hell is Clow when you could do with the fact he should be real. Heck even Fuuma would have made great company, fortunately I managed to pick up 2 new volumes of pretear outside the chalet before I had checked in - helped a little). I was so miserable in the morning and afternoon even the beach and its lovely smells didn't help. I love nature and bodies of water and wind usually cheer me up no matter how down in the dumps I am but it didn't help today - couldn't even bring myself to try out the amusement park which my sis said was fab. Last nite and tonite was fun tho' ... last nite we were in the room yakking and playing with my friend's baby Christopher. Then we were off to the beach restuarant. The sky was beautiful last nite with lots of stars and the moon as big and yellow as I've ever seen. We had satay (thin sticks of BBQ meat in sweet peanut sauce) and Thai food under the open sky with a cool sea breeze and the sea lapping at the shore less than 2 metres away from our table, fun!!! Spent tonite eating chicken wings with Sooks (she made a special attempt to come back tonite - the rest couldn't make it tonite - sheesh and it's a Sat nite) at a bar by the pool and yakking. But on reflection, it makes me rather unhappy. I know we are paid employees but it is surely sickening that we work like this while our bosses are probably partying somewhere knowing their slaves are seeing to the addition of their coffers. As a doctor who is married to one of the bunch, i.e. Christopher's dad, asked me once - "why is anyone going to die if you guys take a break once in a while?" No surprise he insists that Christopher is NOT going to be a lawyer. He also insists that a fine system will be imposed and if we lawyer talk too much, the non-lawyers in the group, namely a pharmacist, himself and Cel who works in the newspaper industry gets to fine us. But before I scare you again, I think this stupid problem is confined to Singapore and US. Friends who have worked abroad have informed me that Aus is a lovely place to practice. I just don't know what is wrong with our jobs. The money is quite comfy but what's the use when there's no time to have a life? Hmm, maybe when we get experienced enuff, we should set up a firm on our own ... that way we can control our lives, but we have to be pretty good by then or we won't survive. Was SMSing Reins today, grumbling about the lack of the net, until I realised there was a net cafe 4 blocks away. I feel so stupid. I slept most of the afternoon, waking up briefly to catch Slam Dunk, Hana Dango and the Jap drama "the Bus". Think I will check my mail, read a few blogs and then go to sleep. Like the last post, there might be weird spacing and characters in this post - blogging at home on the imac with netscape always does this to my posts. Came home feeling strange. Holland V is so bright and cosmo compared to Pasir Ris. It's a lot brighter too, which means I don't get to see stars except above the park near my bedroom window which is sometimes dark enuff at nite after say 2 am to allow me a chance to catch a shooting star once in a billion tries. Of course my neighbours probably think I'm crazy, practically sitting on my window still to catch a glimpse of a star at nite. I feel a little better at home now, family is pretty cool but I gave the excuse I'm not feeling well - the truth is a little too strange to reveal. Someone has obviously been fooling around with the waste bins in the neighbourhood. Well, out of every 3 light posts in the area, one will have a waste bin attached to it - littering in Singapore brings about some pretty nasty consequences - but 2 of them tonite had the waste bin raised so high, I could only just about toss my can into it without tip-toeing. Now I'm not as tall as I would like to be and in Prague I feel like a drawf but I'm taller than the average Asian or the average Parisian so that bin was really unnaturally higher than it should be. Either that or the lack of basketball is driving me crazy. I love the game but fate should have it that my uncle's friend while carrying out the renovations for my house 5 years ago "kindly" removed some extra wires in the house - saying that too many wires would bring down the quality of the TV reception. Unfortunately, Singapore was quietly preparing for cable TV then and no prizes for guessing the use of those extra wires. So no NBA for me since the news and sports are now on the pioneer public cable channel *sigh* And to make things worse, my flu had to occur after I finished work last Monday and persist to date - just when I was hoping to play basketball to my heart's content before leaving for Europe. *Sniff* and my folks won't let me play with the flu, well not since they so remember the newspaper article 10 years ago of a boy dying after he played sports with the flu. Watched more TV this afternoon than I have in the last 3 years since I started pupillage. Wow, I think despite my reservations about Hana D, I may actually get the manga. I am a little reluctant to get it since it smacks of drama wama but what the heck. If I have molah left when I return from Europe (altho I really doubt I'll have $ to spare for the whole of this year) I'll probably get it. And the drama shop at Jurong Point has heaps of new anime - Pretear, My Neighbour Totoro etc. *drool* I think I'll check my mail and go to sleep. I slept like a baby last nite tho despite feeling so miserably alone ... I have been working, drawing and sewing etc. too much on my bed. I do all my designing on the bed too. Chances are my body thinks my bed is now the workstation ... can't sleep the minute I go near my bed ... rats ... Reins I've finished the Snape doll ... tho' my sis says it looks like a pysco nun with oily locks ... but I'm having trouble with the Subaru and Tsuzuki doll ... can't figure out how to do their hair. If there's one thing strange about me, I do things without planning in advance ... I mean I cook without receipes, adding things as and how I feel like, I make dolls without patterns to base the cut-outs on ... I plan trips without much planning too, for one my backpacking trip is pretty loosely planned ... I move and act as and when my instincts tell me too ... anyway you get the drift. Anyhow, the point is I can't figure out how to do Subaru's and Tsuzuki's hair ... someone, anyone help??? Phew, this is a pointless post isn't it? Heh heh, but so is this blog. Got a new idea tho' ... for the next layout which I will probably hand draw since I can't get any Clow fanarts or proper arts other than the very few officially released ones. Of course, if anyone knows where to get some ... tell me (good Tenppou ones are welcomed too - will use them for the archives or links page *grin*) Finally, I'm really glad my hair is majorly short now. My friends say it is more me, the impish look ... but my old do is more professional looking ... hmmm, choices. And I really want more manga ... but I swear I'm sooo broke now *sob* (see the last post for the really good reason why yours truly is cash-strapped). And I need to save $ for either my HK trip with Sooks or the visit to Bel in Aug or Sept (Aus). UGH!!! And I wished I was slimmer ... rats!!! And it's sooo hot still ^ ^;; and I'm wailing like a spoilt brat ... *gets dragged off* Strange story - I think I've managed to master the art of killing mosquitoes by grabbing at them while they fly past me ... my dad kills flies and the like by hitting them with rubber bands despite his supposed bad eyesight, with or without his glasses ... maybe bug killing is a hobby that runs in the family ... I do kill cockroaches with umbrellas and not spray like most normal people do. Also, last nite, on the beach there were a bunch of cats that were following me around everywhere nonestop, until we got into the car and drove back to the chalet ... I didn't feed them but those 3 cats were content to sit under my chair throughout dinner (not under the table to catch scraps - bizzarre) purring away even tho' I had changed tables to avoid them (one of my friends hates nekos - I like nekos and inus except I can't keep one - unless it knows how to buy food from the supermarket and use a can opener, any pet I keep is likely to starve to death no thanks to the odd hours I keep). ... imprisoned within my blood ... Thursday I'm going to Europe with my flu, I'm sure of it. The last time I went there 2 years ago, I was also having the sniffles ... sigh ... Joce thanks for linking ... you're the one with the great drawing skills *bows in awe* ... I'll link back as soon as I find a compy who runs on windows ... tinkering with the layout at home on the imac seems to bomb it *sweatdrops* ... but I still like the mac. Murasaki, have you seen the new imacs, I was trying to get my phone fixed today when I came across a fair show casing the latest imac. WOW!!! Hot sexy compys!!! And does X end like that? Hmmm ... Lilack, I drew a sketch of Integra ... I haven't any anime images of her but I've got the Hellsing manga ... when I get my new compy, and if it works with my present scanner, do you want the manga pics of Intergra? I've got one of her chewing on a cigar and throwing the reader a bemused grin ... she's really one of a kind of a babe ^ ^;; PS, Masako, is there any way to get hold of Hellsing anime? Anyhow, do you want the anime guide to Hunter x Hunter? S$25 ... let me know okies, but I will only be able to get the guide to you (in Chinese) after I get back, gomen. Liz you're sick too? Oh ... hope you get well quick.  You are Spaceman Spiff!Zounds! You are the intrepid Spaceman Spiff, the engaging explorer ensconsed in an unending universe of exotic and evil extraterrestrials! You're brave, but you should give that dictionary a rest. Take the What Calvin are You? Quiz by contessina_2000@yahoo.com! New layout at Reins' ... woman, your Chinese name isn't so bad but okies, I won't call you that. Thanks for getting my next customer's addy ... heee heee ... time to spread my crack empire MHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!! Am so broke. Realised it was indeed a stupid thing to do to put all my savings in fixed deposit at the beginning of last year thus entering year 2002 penniless. Sigh, an unexpected offer of a new job and the not planned in advance squeezing of a nice big trip to Europe before the new job has broken the bank. Fortunately, dad is offering me a nice interest free loan, sigh ... I hate having to borrow $ from family, maybe I'll just assign my fixed d to my dad, hmmm ... Strange news recently. Called my friends last week to say I was going to visit them in London, only to get the awful news they would be outta town during my visit ... was disappointed as hell as I really missed them since they went to UK to study law (and stayed on to practice there - lucky guys, maybe I should have studied in UK too ... hmmm) and then I got an email from them just 5 minutes ago telling me they had mistakenly thought I was visiting London yesterday to this weekend (when they were out for the Easter hols) and that they would be able to meet me afterall ... YIPEEE!!! Happy Easter to everyone!!! ... imprisoned within my blood ... Wednesday Still under the weather but thanks for everyone's nice wishes. Hope to get well soon, I'm not riding a 13 hour plane ride with a flu ... or hope not too. Well, got these from Ruby's blog: HP kid - Harry Potter (this has been pretty constant, am I a magnet for trouble? Actually I am a magnet for trouble myself *sigh*) Type of slacker - Poser Almost all packed. Going to a chalet this weekend with friends, haven't got a clue what to do, must plan. Going shopping on Mon with Bel and then flying off on Tues. Hmmm, running quite short of time really. Reins and Masako and Lin are coming down in April so are we meeting up Meia, Kaori and Aine? What about the weekend, i.e. 20 April and 21 April? Reins and Masako dear, any other Singaporean friends you want to meet up with? Going for lunch now. The last 2 days have been bliss, just lying around the house but for this stupid cold. Friends have been calling me up to chat ... lazing around, practising my piano, surfing, drawing, clearing out my room, planning movies and chalets ... feels like old law school days again ... YIPPEEE!!! Pity it's going to end once I'm done with my Europe trip but a gal's gotta work for a living you know ... plus there's always the Australia trip later in the year to look forward to. Must get auto roaming and an alarm clock, mustn't miss the trains in Europe ^ ^;; ... imprisoned within my blood ... Sunday
Am pretty sick *sniff* Hope I recover before I go to Europe *sigh* Anyway was bored and surfing when I was not hibernating (too lazy to pack room or do work :P) so lookies (above) at what I found on Reins' blog: Yeah, so go take the free enneagram test okies? Hmm, scores were pretty close, between my highest score (for personality 5) and my lowest, the difference was merely 6 points. Reins and Masako, just replied to your email. Do you need me to get the tickets? Hmm, the latest Jap CD advertised on TV looks good. Oh btw, please stop mailing my office account? I've very officially fired them so I'm not going back anymore to check work nor email? And if I was a X-man, I would be her. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Friday I think Clow is being stalked. Hmmm ... ... imprisoned within my blood ... Virus warning from office: "New virus, W32/Mylife.b@mm@MM discovered on 21st Mar 02, Low Risk This mass-mailing worm, written in Visual Basic 6, uses Microsoft Outlook to send itself to all addresses in the Outlook Address book. It arrives in an email containing the following information: Subject : bill caricature Body : Hiiiii How are youuuuuuuu? look to bill caricature it's vvvery verrrry ffffunny :-) :-) i promise you will love it? ok buy Attachment : cari.scr When executed on the local machine, the worm copies itself to the System folder, and uses Outlook to propagate itself to all address found in the Outlook Address book. Running the attachment infects the local machine, an image will be displayed while the worm copies itself to the System folder, using Outlook to propagate itself to all address found in the Outlook Address book. The following Registry key is added to ensure the worm is executed at subsequent system startups: HKEY_CURRENT_USER\Software\Microsoft\Windows\ CurrentVersion\Run\win=C:\WINDOWS\SYSTEM\cari.scr DO NOT EXECUTE the above attachments." Well, as they always say, don't trust emails with bad spelling errors ... ... imprisoned within my blood ... Just a strange fact. I can still remember my old flat. Everything about it, where every piece of furniture lay, down to where the old sega game set used to be. I don't know ... I kinda missed those old days where we were poorer but my life was a lot more simple. I guess I just miss being a kid again. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Ahh, another new day. Going to put yesterday's ickiness behind me. Have to go to work in a while and am dreading it but I might as well finish the last file and disappear into the sunset. Ugh, to make things worse, I think I have the flu. With about only one week to Europe this ain't good. My sis is watching Kare no K ... great show. If only part II would be released ^ ^;; Social blogging - Murasaki, they really did that for XTV? But Fuuma's character isn't really evil ... he just represents a extremely different way of looking at happiness (happiness isn't the word really but I have never found an equivalent for the Jap word other than the Chinese word Xing Fu), to him to grant you happiness lies in granting your innermost wish, even if it kills you or results in you losing an eye. The frog episode proves this point - the kid wanted to live and he granted it. To paint him as a one dimensional villian who just wants to destroy everything just takes all the charm out of the real Fuuma. Aine, I've always had that same disgust with people who stand on double decks too - don't you feel like announcing that the bus could topple coz of them upsetting the balance should it make a sharp turn? But then again, maybe this place should run another of their great campaigns "DO NOT STAND ON THE TOP DECK OF THE DOUBLE DECK BUS" ... we're so full of campaigns anyway. Seriously tho' I think this is just another example of what's lacking in modern value systems - yet again. We're taught from young that we must "excel" in everything. This per se is not bad but when no emphasis is made on the fact that in no matter what we seek to do, we have to consider the effects on other people, we tend to produce a bunch of driven but selfish people. This is so entrenched in the younger generation, we're becoming a bunch of go-getters. The old school of consideration, gentlemanliness, chivalry and the likes is dying. Simply put, selfish parents raise selfish kids. To try to reverse the situation is however, not going to be easy. Goodness gracious, I sound like some moral preachy blogger :P Leareth, can I buy a copy of Jocelyn's douj off you? Onegai *big teary eyes* *sigh* Off to the gallows. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Thursday I realise I have a fetish for long haired guys with glasses with a thing for books - which sets my lust list at Clow, Tenppou and strangely enuff Watari. Hmmm ... ... imprisoned within my blood ... Alright Reins, will do. But can you SMS me phone or do you mean SMS me thru mail? I feel pretty wretched tonite. Spoke to some friends about my problem. They told me to just take my holiday and forget about finishing this file I'm working on. I don't want to sound self-righteous but part of me wonders why I should continue working for a boss who is cheesing me to death. Part me says to just see this last bit of work thru before I go. I'm really losing confidence in myself and my working abilities tho' Bel is telling me it's just a bad combination of bad luck, the usual slight slacking off firing your boss results in and a not so nice boss. I guess I won't dwell on it. I've got to move on but I am so confused whether the recent spate of errors is really my fault or as Bel says, the typical boo boos that people leaving their jobs sometimes get into. I guess it doesn't matter. What is important is I know what to avoid in the future, especially when I move onto my next job. Anyway I should pack my room before my sis comes home and kills me. But just a little more blogging. I had a girl I used to go to kindergarden with and she was the daughter of the plumber who had a shop below our house. Her name was Selena and I remember her being dark, petite with a crooked but enchanting smile. I can't remember whether she was always clinging to me in kindergarden or was I always clinging onto her - my mum's stories are disgustingly inconsistent here. For some strange reason, we lost touch after kindergarden altho her dad's shop was still in the same block as my old house (just before we moved to this new place, her dad sold the shop). Why did I suddenly think of her? Well I saw this girl on the bus today who looked my age and she kinda fitted Selena's description. As I've moved 2 blocks up the street I didn't see if she got off at our old stop. I wonder if it is her. I didn't go up to ask tho but I saw her glancing curiously in my direction or maybe I'm being overimaginative. Also saw another neighbourhood person I'm supposed to have known as a kid on the way home. He's partially blind and mentally disabled but he's always been okay. He's supposed to be my age but looks younger and is generally alright altho he used to grab at people passing him by thinking they were his mother if his mum wasn't beside him (hey even mums have to go to the bathroom from time to time). He's a friendly chap but tonite he was trashing his walking aid as he was crossing the road home and screaming at the top of his voice. I wonder what happened? It's amazing how I hardly know the people in the neighbourhood I am supposed to have grown up in. I have quite a number of acquaintances and friends but it's odd how I don't really know my neighbours. I don't even know what the family staying next door does other than the fact they sell chicken rice at a store across the road. *Ponders* Good nite all. ... imprisoned within my blood ... okay, so far LH order is confirmed. will sms you about the others tomorrow. ... imprisoned within my blood ... I know I said no more bitching but I need some rational views and please give me feedback in all fairness, no need to take my side outta friendship. Question goes like this. When your boss gives you a to do list saying, "hey I printed out an email addressed to you and copied to me for you ... this is the to do list, see to it ok? it's urgent." And it later turns out that the to do list you received is NOT the correct to do list, is it my fault again for not checking that the correct to do list was printed and given to me? Seriously, is it? I've wondered recently whether perhaps I'm getting sloppy at work but personally I can't understand how I'm supposed to work in a team if I keep having to check everyone's work? Okay maybe when its my secretaries' work I do have to keep some form of eye on her but even then ... and now this? I give up ... they can apply to get me removed from the bar if they want. I'm starting not to care about anything anymore. It's too damn difficult ... I wonder if my new place will be as bad if I don't get dis-barred anytime soon. I'm not saying it's not my fault whatsoever for these recent events but recently all the mistakes that have been counted against me is all for NOT checking on other people which I am starting to find somewhat ridiculous. I think I'll go home in about half an hours time. Can't finish and too pissed off to continue working ... ... imprisoned within my blood ... Val, my sympathies to you but I think you have a nice name - just requires some intelligence on the part of the receipient to pronounce it correctly. I think you and the rest of the Meifu people have some idea of what my other name is. It's not that uncommon but I'm pretty much resigned to using my Chinese name Kit even at work rather than my other name (it's not just an online name) coz people keep getting it as "Christopher". For crying out loud ^ ^;; Christopher is a guy's name! Maybe you should introduce yourself as Val and leave it to them to find out your full name if they're interested. And the icon site is great! ... imprisoned within my blood ... Was clearing up room this morning ... couldn't play ball as my nose is half stuffed *sigh* ... darn flu. Room is soooo messy now (being half packed) but found an old folder of all my previous art pieces. Feels nostalgic going thru my old art styles especially my more abstract pieces. Might redo them since most of the stuff is already fading ... those were my student days in which I couldn't afford nice pens *sob* - can't really still ^ ^;; Am in office now so might as well work. Need to get some errands run tonite. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Wednesday Grief, either blogger or imac ate my post ... so here's everything again as I can remember sans the linkings ... gomen. Kawaii layout Murasaki-san. And Leareth, thanks for your help. My friend's looking at New South Wales. Happy jogging Met and all the best for postings this Fri Meia. All the best to Kaori, Jo and Aine too. Can hardly wait for Europe. Need to leave Singapore ... Masako, are Lin's accomodations confirmed? Stopping by office briefly to clear work tomorrow. Stupid file ... but work's work ... meeting Bel for lunch. There's a drinking party for lawyers under 30 tomorrow nite, wonder if I should go. Am not exactly finished packing room. Still half a box in the hall plus my room. Throwing out stuff left and right ... cannot understand why I've been hanging onto my old law notes, they must be disgustingly outdated by now. Still, I feel vaguely surreal about throwing out all my old dusty notes. I hate being so wishy washy. I hate packing too. I prefer my possessions lying in a heap where I can easily retrieve my stuff. When my things are packed, I then to be unable to find things, inevitably restoring my stuff into a messy heap as I try to search out the missing item ... this results in my sis and mum getting pissed with me and forcing me to pack under the threat of death - which results in the whole cycle starting again. If things weren't so expensive here, I would get myself a bachelor pad and mess it to my heart's content - sigh. Stood beside a really pretty guy on the train just now ... he is soooo darn beautiful and looks like a J rocker. Wow ... I won't mind looking like that ^ ^;; Reins, your friend Pei Yi wants to do law in NUS? Hmmm, say should I warn the poor child or not? I got your NE 4 ... please confirm your other orders? Considering the fact the English manga is so under-printed, if your friends are sure about the orders, I'll buy them first for you to pick up when you're here rather than risk them being out of stock in April. Of course, if they're willing to pay postal, I'll mail it to them. Need to get back to packing *sigh* ... AND as I cannot remember the rest of the post ... we end here. Goodnite to all. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Solved my card problems. The credit card company is going to cancel the late charges but I still don't like the way things are done. I took out the credit card with the bank I have an account (no make that 2) with to make payment easier - auto deduction and they tell me that altho my main account was only $50 short (my bill being S$3,000), payment could not be made and these heaps of late charges had to be imposed. I don't buy the nonsense they couldn't accept what was in there and notify me to make further payment of S$50. And apparently, altho my limit of withdrawal was halved for both accounts since the holder of both accounts are the same person, the converse isn't true, i.e. that if one account is insufficient, the bank will NOT take the money from the other account but will instead reject payment ... which is pathetic coz I had more than enuff to pay off last month's credit card bill. I think the way things are run is so crap. I'm taking my business elsewhere. Anyhow, the weather is nothing short of murder here, played basketball for about 20 minutes and it feels like I've been baked forever. Ahh well, gotta pack - both my rubbish from work and for my trip. Meep, better see to my income tax before I leave the country, don't want to be arrested on re-entry for evasion of tax. Altho' I do remember some loophole I studied about in revenue law, lets not try to find out if it works. I hate packing. My folks are of the view that if I ever get to work in HK or London, my apartment would be declared unfit for human habitation within 2 weeks of my moving in. With folks like these, who needs critics? :P Leareth, thank you for the mail. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Tuesday Got my hair cut and had lunch with Bel but other than that, today ain't exactly a bed of roses. Went back briefly to get stuff and had to send the files in my in-tray back. Sigh, I no longer work for the firm, can't they get it? And the stupid registry wants me to pay to correct a wrong entry they themselves made on one of my files - like NO way!!! Stupid credit card company did something I don't like. Ohh, I can afford the late charges imposed except I think it's stupid what they did, so if they can't give me a satisfactory explanation tomorrow, I'm going to cancel my visa with them and get cards with Citibank - which is a much better offer anyday anyway. Hmph, and stupid wrong phonecall distracted me from Metal Gear and cost me my "life". *grumbles* Nevermind, I'll wake up tomorrow and all this irritations will be behind me :P Ahhh, Reins ... EVA 4 is out. Can you confirm all the orders for me coz I'm going to the manga shop tomorrow (Wed) nite? Otherwise, I'll just buy your book first and worry about your other orders later? ... imprisoned within my blood ... *Finds imac back outside room near telephone wire* I'm connected!!! Thanks Leareth but how long do you have to do the bar in Australia to qualify? For example, if you're qualified in a commonwealth country can you skip pupillage and just take the bar exams or do you have to "re-serve" pupillage with an Australian firm? Reins, uhm ... well on the Malaysian side I don't know what they are looking for but if you're leaving Singapore, the Singapore custom is usually not too sticky. If you're entering, they'll check for large amounts of chewing gum, cigarettes and booze and yeah, drugs too - more than 20 cents in weight and you'll hang. As I assume you aren't bringing any of these, I think you should be fine. Oh boy, it's already 10. That leaves me little time for a game, piano and packing before I meet Bel-ster for lunch. GOTTTA GOOOooooo ... ... imprisoned within my blood ... Monday Going on leave for 2 days and sis' imac is lying in her room coz we're watching VCDs off it in the bedroom but this means we're way too far from any phone line to access the net. Need to find new compy. My sis assured me I should get one before I go to Europe so she could babysit it for those 2 weeks to make sure it worked fine. Considering I'm thinking of getting something really graphic and music intensive and the fact she's having exams (that's why she can't come on the Europe trip) - I don't think so :P ... imprisoned within my blood ... Met ... have fun at home. FYI, I'll be in Europe from April 2 to April 16. Hmm, Masako ... revert no? ... imprisoned within my blood ... Leareth, I need an urgent favour, I have a friend who is qualified as a solicitor and advocate in Singapore who is keen to take the Australian bar. Can you help me ascertain the requirements, onegai. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Hmmm ... I want to go home!!! ... imprisoned within my blood ... Masako, got your email. Will try to find some space for her but would be great if she has accomodations. And thank you for everyone's well wishes - I passed *beams*. And Met I think the story is good. Went to Circus de Sol on Saturday nite. Nice. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Friday Thanks for the well-wishes too Wingy *waves* Yeah, looks like the both of us will be having a nice weekend. Rather tired, will sleep now ... hopefully with dreams of me friends, Europe or Clow ^___^ or better still maybe me touring Europe with my friends and Clow *wide grin* Met' did you write that story yourself or is it a quote? It sounds good. Haven't seen Val blogging in a while - ahhh, sorry for being nosy but you okay? ... imprisoned within my blood ... I've passed my Jap test ... *BIG GRIN* I could have done better but for careless mistakes and the fact I didn't manage to cover the last chapter of my book before the paper started. The oral test was okay. I was unfortunately the first to go but as the written paper didn't start until everyone had finished their oral test, that gave me enuff time to finish the 2nd last chapter at least *phew* Quite silly actually tho', I couldn't remember to save my life what hospital was in Jap so I just scribbled something I remember writing last week ... and it turned out to be 100% on point *double phew* Anyway, went out to celebrate with me folks. Circus tomorrow!!! ... imprisoned within my blood ... One of the secretaries got me a big sunflower. It's pretty and it's nice of her, but she obviously hasn't heard of my famous flower theory that all my close friends know: "How would you like it if one day you were walking along the road, minding your own business when a large rose comes along, grabs off your head and offers it to his carnations girlfriend as a token of his undying affection?" I'm weird, I know. But I still think flowers that grow in the wild, amongst fields are still the most beautiful. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Glad to know it turned out ok for you. Wish me luck tonite - Jap test - URGH!!! 2 more days of being "officially" still in office (tho' practically, I'm giving myself 4 to 5 more working days) - I can hardly wait till Europe and the kitties - Reins and Masako's visit (and start at my new place). Speaking of which, Imoto-san, I had a dream last nite that you were at my house and we were waiting for Reins and Masako and the 2 Australian kitties and puppy to arrive ... PS: I'm planning to visit my best friend in Sydney over the August national day holidays. If I manage to pull it off, would it be feasible for me to land in on you guys at Perth for a day or 2? Met my friend J on the way back from court. He works for my boss' wife. Poor boy was carrying 2 to 3 bags of stuff while she was sauntering ahead with another assistant. On seeing my quizzed expression, he said "Yeah, I'm the mule". Maybe I'm prejudiced by what her husband has been doing to me so far, but I don't think that was very nice of her. As the old saying goes, a man's character can only been seen by the way he treats his subordinates (servants was the original word when this saying was coined). Speaking of sayings, I had a good chat with a friend yesterday: there is apparently a really cool saying from a particular movie which is similar to my dad's philo in life. It goes like this: "If you must repay my kindness, be kind to another and tell him to pay you back in the same way". I think that's a great philosophy. Koola cat is a hoot!!! Onni-chan's recommendations are superb. I wish I could scan some for you guys but I've hooked my scanner off the cpu at work and my sis' imac hasn't got the extra memory space to allow for the installation of a massive art programme. Sigh, I need my desktop pronto - they'll providing laptops at my new place but I want my own desktop for my anime and designing (tho' lame me skills are) purposes. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Thursday Eve glad things turned out better. Don't worry Wingy, all the best. My sis is telling a disgusting story about her life after her wisdom teeth were removed. It's hilarious. Uhm, for people who have removed your wisdom teeth, does it hurt? I removed mine and didn't feel a thing even after the aesth wore off half an hour after the op ... everyone around me tells me I'm a weirdo from Mars cause it's supposed to be painful. B and my sis got MC and my sis' bf got 2 weeks off work. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Ahhh, home at last with most of my things back in my hall ... except I have 6 boxes of thingees (I've got less than a week to deal with them before I go off to Europe). My 80 year old gran was asking how the hell does someone amass so much junk tho' working for only 3 years. Heh heh, and she hasn't even started on my manga lying around the house yet. I really should be studying my Jap but I'm tired. I'll go sleep and wake up early tomorrow to study. Spent the evening packing and dragging it home with dad's help. We then sat outside my house on the stairs cuddling a cup of milo while yakking with my dad. Me and my dad love sitting in the corridoor to enjoy the breeze and yak. My mum thinks we're crazy ... Ouch, my mum is screeching about something my aunt bought, I need a less hyper mum. Goodnite. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Virus Alert: Just got this from the office IS department - "Please do not open any emails with the attachment Patch.exe from the following clients: XXXX" Well, I can't tell you who the firm's clients are but it's save to say that you might not want to open any emails with the attachment Patch.exe anyway. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Take heart I think practice is good actually even tho' I don't appreciate my lifestyle right now. Guess it just depends on who you work for. The Europeans and Australians are sane. ... imprisoned within my blood ... I want a guy that is like Clow ... anyone seen one? ... imprisoned within my blood ... Met thank you for your concerns but I don't want you to pray to Satan. The cows touch is nice tho' ... Reins, what do you think? Ushi-san coming to my rescue. And oniichan is the guy who sells manga at my fav manga haunt. He's a little younger than me but he thought I was younger than him so I've taken to calling him oniichan. We get on well coz we share very similar tastes in manga and both of us like to doodle. The shop is part of a larger manga chain and oniichan and an older colleague of his I call uncle run the branch at Boon Lay. One of my good friends used to stay at Boon Lay so when we were cutting classes at uni, we were ding donging between Boon Lay and HV so I naturally started getting my manga there. After some time, I guess coz I like to talk to people, even strangers, I made friends with the 2 of them. I tend to make friends easily, male or female, young or old. Most of them are fooled by my blur kid act ... MAHWHAHHWHAHA!!! *evil grin* However, if this means anything is going on dearie, I would have like billions of bfs *I wish*. ... imprisoned within my blood ... I'm an oreo cookie. Say, Masako, who's looking for X translated? FYI, Singapore has X and various other manga translated into English so let me know which deprived X fan requires sustence pronto. However, as Reins will tell you, Singapore's translations are slow but hey, at least they're there. Reins, I haven't seen Love Hina 4 yet or I would have sent it to you. I take it that until you inform me otherwise, as soon as I see Love Hina and Neon E translated, I should buy it and send it to you. Ahh, just to be sure, you are asking me to find another set of Love Hina 1 to 3 for your friend right? Is this an order coz I'm going to then ask my oniichan to reserve the books? Do I smell another potential customer here? I just got all 14 volumes - in Chinese. Say, if you really are dying to read Love Hina that bad, when you come, you could look at the pictures and I'll translate for you. The Love Hina anime I have with me is with English subs so any customers??? Just a reminder to those who have my office email address, don't use my hell hole account after April. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Murasaki san, this is gorgeous ... it almost made me forget I've got files to finish ... I WANNA DRAW LIKE THAT ... WAIIII!!! I hope to be able to do some drawings this weekend ^__^ ... friends invited me to join them this weekend for the performance thingee in town. What the heck, why not? Gotta go, can't leave the pupil in the lurch! ... imprisoned within my blood ... I am the top 2 searches for "Clow Blog" and the 3rd top search is caused by me too *grins* Uhm Masako, it's just you and Reins only. I only said I wished the puppy and kitties - Leareth, Tsu and Lilack could come. Hall is okay with you guys? Fine ... it should be fun. My hall is a lot breezier compared to my room anyway. Yeah, I'm trying to see if Meia, Aine and Kaori can join us on the weekends. I'll send you guys the "plans" again. Am a little "seaan" today (feeling lazy) ... going to sneak off early coz got Jap test tomorrow ... aiieee, promise Alv to pass him stuff on Friday ... whoops ... better call him. TOO MUCH WORK!!! :P EUROPE HERE COMES A MAD KITTEN!!! I really like the new manga Alv recommended ... Koola kat is soooo hilarious!!! ... imprisoned within my blood ... heheheh, senritsu.net is back XDDDDD Check the blog okay? Thanks for the words or warning about S'pore. Heheh, this will be the first time I set foot outta M'sia. Hah, me am country bumpkin. Don't be surprised if I go"Oooh" and "aaah" at everything. anyway, Kit.... ^_^ want me to make a layout for you while I'm there? ... imprisoned within my blood ... All the best for your application Wingy. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Em, take care and get well soon. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Wednesday Onii chan's manga is hilarious!!! Sugoi!!! The story is about a mechanical cat named Coola and his adventures. The art is rather on the simple side but it's hilarious!!! YK, if you're reading this, I'm sorry my problems spilled over onto you. Hang in there, Coola tomorrow will be a treat and thanks for your anime. We've got to start an anime club or something. You see, the guys in my year are not too keen on anime (guys in my year are actually 2 years older than the girls thanks to national service with the army) but this batch of guys 2 years my junior in university ranking (i.e. born in the same year as me) seem to love it. I have had these "junior" guys come up to me and discuss manga and anime with me while the guys in my year have little interest or understanding of manga and anime. But it's been interesting, most of the older folks are under the misconception manga is like comics, i.e. for kids only but when they look at the quality of the anime and manga I keep lying around in the office like Saiyuki and Naruto, they become interested. Actually I am amused that at about this time I'm leaving the firm, people in the firm are becoming significantly interested in manga and anime. Oniichan's so sweet. Got me something I was looking for without me even having asked him for it and offered to help me carry my things to the bus stop (but I told him it was okay and he was quite busy anyway). W came up to me today at work to tell me he found out what has been happening to me the last few weeks and said he's on my side no matter what. SL was supportive too and we chatted for a while. I've got to tell you, I've got great friends. It sounds cliched but altho these few weeks have been an absolutely stinky time for me, my friends have been the best. Metty - wonderful layout!!! ... imprisoned within my blood ... I don't know whether to laugh or cry when the waiter is prettier than I am. Had sandwiches with secretaries at O'Brien's today. Not bad. Onii-chan got me a set of manga, must go collect. Lots of work all of a sudden again but am still unaffected now ... probably will bitch tomorrow ^__^;; Off to Boon Lay!!! Or Boon Lay e ikundesu!!! ... imprisoned within my blood ... Am a philosophical drunk. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Aimo's blog has this great link to this Naruko site which is hilarious!!! Especially this ... LOL and this is way cool. I want PS 2 too. Say, hate to burst your bubble but would you, Meia and Kaori be having exams in May or April? Reins and Masako are likely to be coming down in late April ... All the best for next semester Laine. Leareth don't worry ... as long as you remain in Australia or work in Europe, you're fine. Unless you like pain, avoid New York and Singapore law offices. Hong Kong offices are okay but the ones that do corporate work are hellish ... Lilack thanks for the tip ... he's sane? Sigh, but I think pink Youji is cute tho' ... and yeah, you've got to explain the disease thingee ^__^ Reins, as long as you don't pee in public and don't litter you're fine. You can chew gum, you just can't SELL it and no, mentos is NOT gum. Smoking is not allowed at most eateries but you don't have a problem with that right? Masako, since there's now 2 of you, if you and Reins bunk at my place is it alright we bunk in the hall? Well my sis is studying for her final exams, and I would like to let her have the room to study (Reins the nastiest thing about Singapore is not the litter thingee but the fact land is so expensive most of us stay in wheeny little flats - think Hong Kong)? I'll get mattresses and all and we can have slumber parties. If not, I'll get you guys a hotel. Let me know? Masako, do you want the rough guide plans I've made for Reins? Let me know and I'll send it to you. Are you guys meeting other people here too? Sigh, I wish Leareth, Lilack and Tsu were here too ... except there is no way I could squeeze all 5 of you unless my aunt is willing to lend some space ^ ^;; Murasaki he's cute ... ooh, guys with attitude and little glasses ... hmmm ... irresistable. News, I got my leave - all of it ... subject to me finishing all my work. The bad thing is I am not outta here, but I managed to negotiate the following which is somewhat good: Out of the 8 days of leave he wanted not to give coz I'm not in Europe yet, I will take all 8 days. I get the first 2 days off unmolested and will for the remaining 6 days (or 1 and half weeks) come to work when I please, leave when I please as long as I finish the trial preparations for him *sigh* and close all my finished files and hand over all my files to the lawyers who will be taking charge before I board the plane to Europe. It's not a great deal considering I'm entitled to vamoose next Tues pronto but it's a fair compromise. I've got boxes and boxes of books at home now to sort. The things you amass when given a room is unbelievable and to think I threw out half my knick knacks. My office is almost bare except for my files now and I actually like it like that ... hmmm ... minimalist details. Anyhow, the overall arrangement is not too bad I think. Better than getting my whole leave cancelled. The only thing to worry about now is my packing ... dad helped me carry one box yesterday so we had 2 clowns on the bus with one huge box each, laughing away at ourselves. The people on the bus were quite nice, helping us quite a bit by stopping the bus for us to get off and helping when my dad dropped a book of mine. Most people think I'm a tourist or expat or a foreign born kid so I usually get the friendly welcome-to-Singapore treatment which never fails to amuse me. Oh well, I've got about another 3 boxes of things to go ... except I shouldn't be moving anything on Fri coz it's my Jap test day. Hmmm ... ... imprisoned within my blood ... Tuesday I eat my words ... you're back!!! So how so how? Am I seeing mother cat and little neko Masako in April? *Runs round room happily* It gives me GREAT pleasure to announce that I snucked off to BK to work today :P No, actually it gives me great pleasure to announce I've cleared my room. Just about 2 more boxes of stuff and I'm cleaned outta here!!! ^____^ Never knew I had so much junk tho' *sweatdrops* ... imprisoned within my blood ... http://216.74.101.161/acidspit/ Need your sing adress, nyo. Need to fill in leave form. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Ano Murasaki-san, so who's the bish and which manga series is this? ... imprisoned within my blood ... Ahhh ... looks like Eve san also needs Muraki and Sei-chan to pay certain visits to certain people ... I hope you get a better timetable Eve. And good luck to you too for parking space. You're shorter by 6 inches on one leg??? Please tell me it's coz when you're standing on one leg, you don't stand up that straight? AHHHH ... Reins is coming and her Snape sama doll is not quite finished *panics* I know I said I wasn't going to mope anymore but coz I need to rant to keep sane or at least prevent myself from turning to a worse lunatic, here's just a bit more of my grousing: Met my very good friend at court this morning by coincidence and on impulse decided to snuck off together to the Supreme Court's bar room. There were people in the outer room but the inner chamber was all empty and cozily dark. Sitting in a quiet, dim olden style British reading room on velvet cushioned couches with coffee and a butler to attend to your caffine needs for one hour is a good way to destress. Poor chap is having a hard time too, we chatted a lot. He's really been very supportive and very helpful thru this whole period despite the fact he's not having a good time too. I miss the times when my friends were my colleagues - before they all gave up and left this place. Ah well, I'm now one of the ones who have given up on this place too. I hope the ones who are still staking it out here get a fairer deal than I did. Anyhow, we concluded that whom you work with determines whether you are enjoying your work so we left the bar room promising to seek out our other pals and start our own firm for humans (emphasis) when we're seasoned enuff ^___^ I want to work at a place where people act like people and not *insert the appropriate words*. It's quite sad when you consider this is only my 3rd year and I feel so disillusioned already. Practice itself is enjoyable but work just has been so painful sofar... is it just this place (in which case I can really look forward to leaving - hopefully this is the case) or is it the same all over this country? I don't know but I am definitely going to try to change or take charge of my life at my new place. The reviews of the new place is good but you wonder how much of it is true and how much of it is good PR-ing. But thru this awful time, I'm grateful to my friends for being so supportive and helpful, including my online friends. I guess I should look forward to the new start and put this whole mess behind me. Escapist? Perhaps but I can't keep dwelling in the past altho the important lessons from this whole fiasco will never be forgotten. I can't help but wonder if the way to go is to piah (work hard) at a large firm for the next 2 to 3 years before my next self-evaluation session (and learn more things in the process to keep my options open and diverse) or to scale back and go into quiet practice (which will unfortunately, limit my future choices). The smaller firms here are cosier but the work tends to be uneventful and repetative and you end up not doing quality work. Boutique firms are sometimes a good balance of a good environ with good work but you can't really stay there for long as they are "family" owned i.e. if you're not the partner's daughter/son or friend you won't really get far. The larger firms offer good work and the options are diverse but they seem to be stuffed with people who have no qualms about backstabbing etc. to get what they want. I've seen enuff here. You have people who plot and scheme to get ahead, no worries about hurting other people ... I find that disgusting. While I don't think it is feasible to be matyring yourself i.e. you shouldn't feel beholded to a place, why can't you get ahead in life the honest way? Why do you have to hurt others in a manner that is (in my view) unjustified? I want to stay human. If dreams are the means to keep one's sanity, I want to open a firm that does good work with my friends without letting it pick up the "family/friend" trait of most boutique firms. I'm sorry everyone. I will try not to mope anymore ... and once again, to all my friends - sankyuu for everything. Your regular insane rantings on anime, manga and Clow should resume shortly. ... imprisoned within my blood ... If I don't get my leave I'm calling in Sei-chan and Muraki-sensei or both. Heck for good measure, Lilack san, what's the name of that Sei-chan look alike again? Got interested in Yasha (not inuyasha but yasha). Anyone read it? I can get the Jap version here but I suspect I won't be able to read Jap for a good time until I get much further in my Jap course, so if anyone has seen the translated versions, let me know? Back to work, I really have to be in chambers early tomorrow. Reins, where are you and where is your blog now? I think that shortcut thingee you gave me last week is broken now. Oh well, you're welcomed to blog here if yours is down. So are you and little neko aka Masako coming together in April? ... imprisoned within my blood ... Taking a short break from work. My fault ... couldn't concentrate. Then again doing work in front of anime and/or Jap drama has never quite been too successful. Kitties and puppy san, why are you incurable diseases? Do I get to be some virus that attacks your brain then? Masako, gomen for being naggy but please concentrate on getting your health back first. Dieting can wait till you're well again. YK likes Saiyuki - yes!!! Arigato for your offer for Escafl but what I really would like right now is Hellsing - I luv the manga. Strange tho, the name of the anime and the mention of Alucard got passerbys quite curious. I do hope my leave gets approved ... his sec is telling me he is refusing to sign my release papers. One of the pupils said something painfully funny today - he said that my resignation more like a messy divorce than a resignation :P Found some new links but I can't put them up yet coz am at home ... imac + Netscape doesn't really agree with Blogger very well, gomen. I want to be a photographer or a concert pianist - result of "hearing" Long Vacation over working. Ahhh ... back to me further and better particulars. *sigh* ... imprisoned within my blood ... Monday Leareth chan, thanks for the concern but judging by the close legal ties between Aus and Singapore, they'll either extradiate you or charge you for murder on both sides ... However, just between you and me, Seiichirou sounds like a great idea. I like Muraki but I'm not too keen on him visiting coz he can be outta control, at least Sei-chan technically kills only as per the contract right? Don't worry about me. I'm tougher than they think. Ahhh, homosexuality falls under the offence of unnatural sex. For that matter, oral sex is also an offence unless it is followed up by the deed proper, i.e. on the basis it is excused as foreplay leading up to intercourse. Sexual offences under the rather outdated penal codes imposed by England on its colonies is rather a joke. For one, a husband can force himself on his wife, no matter how unwillingly she is to the point it is rape but as long as he doesn't hurt her physically other than you-know-where, he's innocent as far as the law is concerned. I could go on about the strangeness of the law ... btw I actually have an article here on sexual offences. I might just send a copy to you *winks* I want to buy a new desktop. They're providing laptops at the new place I am going to work but I would like a state of the art desktop to play with and design on at home, when I'm at home ... oh ... hmmm, so do I really need one? I can't really decide 7_7 I'm done with moping ... it's time for cleaning up and preparing to get out of this hell swamp. If anyone asks me one more time about my leaving date I'm going to tell them "NOT SOON ENUFF" and run off manically laughing. So there!!! ... imprisoned within my blood ... It's been a bad week. Changed the layout thinking some color would cheer me up - unfortunately, didn't work, don't really like this that much but won't be able to do anything for the time being. One good thing tho' - spent the whole weekend studying for my Jap test next week as I decided I had enuff of work - feel marginally better but wish I could curse in Japanese. Then again, have sneaky plan to mitigate problem created this week so I might take some minute pleasure in that. Sigh, I really had a bad enuff week ... trust me, it's reached a point the pain is numbing so will the idiots who keep mailing me for indecent favours, business ventures while posing as the finance department of China, Nigeria etc. etc. please get lost somewhere really far? I'm having a very miserable time at work, rather broke ... an old crush called getting me all confused again altho I know I have zero of a chance, my best friend is leaving for Aus soon for 12 months and I need a haircut so don't worry I'm not miserable and feeling pathetic enuff that you have to jam my mailbox with such stuff. Went to Carefour with my parents to help them buy their luggage bags (so skipped basketball) and carried 3 luggage bags one inside the other outta Carefour, down 4 flights of steps and up a bus. Not too bad considering each bag is actually large enuff to stuff a human body in ... strange how much energy you can get from pent up unhappiness. Dinner was not too bad, with my folks, my sis and her bf - FYI Thompson's Jap restuarants are pretty good. Dad and mum are trying to cheer me up ... by distracting me with PS and the Europe trip - I love my folks. Wanted to buy Tim B's Nightmare Before Christmas figurines at Suntec but soooo expensive ^ ^;; Uhm sorry to hear about the storm and your layout Met ... Kaori and Masako, hope you both're better. Tsu thank you but I'm afraid the problem isn't so simple ... but don't worry, I'll live and yeah, I'm looking forward to the trip. It will take more than this to get me down and out *loppy sided grin* altho I can't deny it's making me unhappy. Tooda looes people, other social blogging will have to wait, I need to sleep and then mope a little more but I'll be fine. I know I'm being wussy, but indulge me? The thing is as my dad said "Julius C expected betrayal but not from Brutus". I expected things to be nasty but not from my dear mentor. Now when nasty things happen at work, I believe that the whole team should work together to solve it and not indulge in finger pointing and bitching, i.e. I would work my subordinates to solve the problem and not push all the blame to them etc. etc. I made a mistake - fine, I don't expect to be shielded from it but when the mistake is an unintentional one I don't expect to be insulted in my face. Plus I really have had quite enuff of the crap I've been getting since my resignation - which I find totally irrational. I'm just tired of the whole thing. I refuse to think about it anymore ... but it's a good lesson learnt, in a very bitter way. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Saturday Am Chandler. Sigh, I know I should be working but I'm not interested :P So I did a layout instead and there's a few hours of my life down the chute ... *sigh* I don't feel like working anymore. Part of me feels like throwing a childish tantrum and telling them to "shove" it. *sulks* ... imprisoned within my blood ... My IQ is a pathetic 135??? *sigh* ... imprisoned within my blood ... Thanks Wingy ... I'll be fine. I'm leaving anyway. It's just that I'm disappointed about things. I'm still not out of the woods yet. I can understand they're unhappy with my recent mistakes (this much I admit I myself am unhappy with myself) but I don't understand why the whole issue of me leaving has to be that personal ... *sigh* Anyway, I've got to work on fixing things ... see everyone next week. ... imprisoned within my blood ... So am I seeing you and Masako in April? ... imprisoned within my blood ... me have passport ^_^... imprisoned within my blood ... Me am coffee flavored. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Thanks for the kind words from everyone. I wish I could say I'm okay but I'm not. I'm downright miserable but I'll live. It'll take more than that to kill me. Sure those people might get me down but I'm all the more determined to show them I'm made of stronger stuff than they are. I've always been a little irrational when I have to fight my goliaths but I refuse to bend or kneel to authority unless I truly respect it. I hope it does not come down to it, but if I have to engage in "showdown", so be it altho the magnitude of the whole nonsense amazes me, it's only a job for goodness sake. On retrospect, I must admit, to tell a senior partner to his face not to accuse me of things he cannot substantiate is rather impolite coz I could have ignored him really but I don't regret it. I just regret that the man who is tantamount to being my "dad" in practice and with whom I had slogged for for the last 2 years because he was a respectable man and someone I did look up to, turns out to be such a monster when I have to leave but more importantly, I regret this afternoon's confrontation had brought out also an extremely ugly side of me that I usually try to suppress - you know it's ugly when you win a shouting match (albeit over the phone) with a lawyer with at least 13 years of practice under his belt. I don't blame him anymore but I don't think I'm going to that birthday party I was planning to throw for him. I'll get his friends and prepare the cake but don't count on me being there that day. Nevertheless, I've learnt an important lesson. I like success but may this blog be my witness that I'm not sacrificing my integrity and humanity for it and in the event I become someone in power, I will not let it blind me. I am looking forward to the chalet with my friends and Europe with my mum and dad. Altho I am a little sad that before I get back, my best bud would already be in Australia and it'll be a year before I see her again. Ahhh, it's really late. Off to bed now, I have to get up ridiculously early tomorrow so I might as well make it easier on myself *sigh* ... imprisoned within my blood ... Friday Took the DOH test and turned up Sorata ^__^ Em, I don't know ... was trying to draw Clow halfway when I saw this person who could be Clow or Sirius (blame Murasaki no). Masako, when are you coming? Reins ... let me know when your papers clear no? Back to bitching. As Tsu once said, perhaps what keeps me sane is my friends and this blog and me blog friends. Don't worry Leareth and Met', I'll hang in there. I'm pissed I really am. Anyway, if I'm such an irresponsible worker then why on earth am I supposed to go to some deserted part of the island tomorrow early in the morning to take evidence coz some idiot himself doesn't want to go. I feel like asking him "do you want to see what really irresponsible is like". I really have better ways to spend my weekend but no, I'm going to have to work thru tho' I really should be studying for my Jap test next week. Would you believe me if I say I'm really angry? My best friend is similarly stuck in the office ... while her bosses are having a nice weekend break ... But one good thing comes out of this. I've learnt from my present firm how ugly selfishness can be. I never want to be like them. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Thanks Reins ... it'll be okay. It's just I'll miss her. Hmm, I could visit her somewhere in the 6th month. Anyway, I've got bigger gripes now. But am looking forward to meeting you again. I'm sorry for griping, it's just that things have been awful since I tendered. I really hate this place now. The only thing that makes it bearable are my friends here. ... imprisoned within my blood ... I've been told by my boss today that some partners think I'm irresponsible. They think because I'm leaving I don't care about my work. Well, I know I have been a little careless of late but that's coz I'm overworked you gits!!! You don't dump files on someone without running the risk something goes wrong. The fault in any case is not 100% mine. I gave instructions which were not followed. My fault only lies in not double checking. In any case, I have never denied liability for the problem. But the point is this. If I don't care, why am I working late? Why do I go home at midnite still and come in at 7 on certain days? My contract only requires me to be here from 9 to 6. I admit my brain has not been 100% and I've made mistakes. I understand if I'm told I'm stupid or careless but to tell me I'm irresponsible is something I will not live down. So I asked him to terminate me as of now. He accused me of proving his friends correct to which I replied "No, it's just that if you're not happy with my work you shouldn't be forced to put up with it." I won't forget this nor am I likely to forgive this in the near future. I'm very unhappy, very. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Aaaw.... it must be sad for you. But fret not! There's always e-mails, snail-mails and such... I had to wait 4 years before I could meet with my best bud again in KL. We wrote so many letters in those 4 years.... oh the trees that were slaughtered for the nonsense. ^^ ... imprisoned within my blood ... Thursday I just found out this morning that they're sending my best friend to Sydney to work for the next 12 months. She leaves mid April. I won't be back from Europe to see her off so literally I won't see my best friend after April for one year. It's good experience for her but I'll miss her ... so excuse me while I go mope in the corner. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Am somewhat Immature! Only "somewhat"? Wow ... ... imprisoned within my blood ... Aiyoo... I hope things do work out for the best. *hugs* Hehehehe, I will be holding my passport by the end of the week, hopefully. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Wednesday Tsu, I haven't seen it out yet. Glad your blog is back. You've been speaking to Met? Hi-ies Metty how's things *waves* ------------------ Am in deep trouble. I feel like a Balrog just caught my ankle with its fire whip and is dragging me down with it to a bottomless pit. And mind you, I'm no wizard. Am totally dead, in trouble ... you get the drift. Won't be around for the next few days. Will probably be hanging from a tree and pecked at by crows who think I'm dead. SMS or mail me if urgent but don't use my yahoo account ... use my you-know-what account. ... imprisoned within my blood ... I can never understand why the lack of food doesn't affect me too badly but the lack of sleep does. I can never understand why I can talk like nobody's business when it's none of my business but can't talk to save my butt when it matters. I can never understand why I can absolutely sit still at the compy playing games for hours or read novels on end or sketch until I ignore food and sleep and yet find 15 minutes of concentrating on my work or piano impossible. I can never understand why I hate to eat and yet hate to be hungry. I can never understand why I hate to be hurt and yet not mind hurting others. I cannot understand why running around does not tire me but sitting still in a room for 2 hours exhausts me. I can not understand why I wrote this passage. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Am the color green (taken off Em's blog) ... imprisoned within my blood ... I'm the letter H and also the letter C. Off for lunch now. The cover for the YnM douj is done *grins* ... imprisoned within my blood ... Had a very bad hearing this morning :P decision very weird ... But irresponsibly not too bothered. Am thinking of getting chalet with friends over weekend ... hmmm ... laha ahhahah le dum de dum ... ... imprisoned within my blood ... Tuesday  This is only the rough sketch but me hopes it amuses until I can do it up properly ^__^Need to do this up properly but I'm not too good with krad. My dark looks a little better than my initial attempts but to me krad has that appealing almost insane quality that is sorely lacking in "this" krad. Hmmm ... and the hair, the hair ... UGHHH!!!! *rubs out sketch and tries to amend messy hair bits* Ano does anyone know how his hair works? ... imprisoned within my blood ... This person has some nice CCS cosplay pictures. Meia and Kaori, cosplay pics of Clow sama please ... onegai *puppy doggy eyes* Forgot where I got the blog which provided the link *gomen* ... imprisoned within my blood ... Mas take care. Don't push the diet thingee too far. Concentrate on getting better. No worries about the Jap classes. I should be able to concentrate on them full time after next week (too many hearings this week :P). Yes, Sunday was fun right? Be posting the Dark-Krad thingee in a while. Starting on the YnM thingee soon *keeps fingers crossed*. Already drew the base board. Now a matter of fleshing it properly. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Well, I haven't seen Hellsing the anime yet but Hellsing the manga is like whoooh. It does explain why Alucard is so dedicated to Integra-sama but I've only got volume 1 (am waiting for volume 2 to be in stock again). Hmmm ... had a great lunch of duck rice with friends. Pity Deeps had to dash and couldn't join us. We then adjourned to Edo sushi for ice-cream. Nice ^___^ ... imprisoned within my blood ... Weellll ... do you want the crazy thingees there so far then? It's not very good but it's all I can offer *sweatdrops*. I'm probably going to clear them out so you can have them if you want to. I think the loss of my Trigun site and Umeda site is unsettling me plus the uncertainty of a new job environment. If I'm going to be scooting between HK and Singapore or Bangkok and Singapore, and working harder than I do now *panics*, I'll have a lot less time no? Think I'm going to abandon my sites and then redo them after a year's hiatus ... probably(?) So ... will it be April or June for you? Masako are you better? Personal nonsense - Am tired ... stupid application fixed for tomorrow. Don't really wanna work >_< ;; Am pretty popped coz drawing too much recently as well as mugging Jap. Finished the Dark-Krad sketch, will scan later *grins* AHHHHH *runs round room screeching* And the YnM douj still in my head and torturing me *grabs hand* NOOooooooo!!! Do serious work you stupid appendage!!! ... imprisoned within my blood ... Monday http://216.74.101.161/acidspit/ nyaaaaa.... what will happen to the insanity that is the Darklands? ... imprisoned within my blood ... Am going to Macs tonite to work and draw and study Jap ^ ^;; I wonder how much can I actually finish tonite? ... imprisoned within my blood ... Happy layout!!! Nooo nooo ... don't want to share *pouts* ... will share possibly but grudgingly with girlfriends but NOT Touya! Positively am not sharing Clow with boy who's prettier than me *nuh uh* nyahhhhh!!! *runs off* Am not too good at drawing but will be setting own fanart site up anyway ^___~ must bomb present sites to make way *sigh*. Bai bai ... *hits delete key* ... imprisoned within my blood ... This has gotta be the healthiest layout I have ever seen ^___^ I've decided. I'm going to pull the bomb on my sites ... HAHAHAHA!!! ... imprisoned within my blood ... Sunday Murasaki-san ... NO NO NO!!! Clow is mine mine mine!!! *bundles off the magician posessively* Nooooo!!! ... imprisoned within my blood ... AAHHHHH!!! I dropped my new phone. It fell outta my bag while I was chatting with my dad and hit the step 3 steps below me!!! *breathes* Okay, sans a few scratches it is almost okay. Nothing sounds broken but the tip of the plastic antanea is smashed in at one corner. Sigh, it is better this way I guess. The tip probably took the impact of the fall thus saving my phone. My phone still works okay and I can change the tip if I want to *wails* WAIIII!!! None of my phones have NOT been dropped. My last phone was worse ... it fell down a flight of stairs and I flung it across the hall in a sleepy stupour ;_; On the other hand, lesson 3 is covered ^___^ Met with Meia, Aine and Kaori today and tried the highly recommended katsu sandwiches. Quite nice but skip the set. The salad and chips are blah. We've got a new idea for a dark-krad sketch and a YnM douj ... stay tuned ^_~ ... imprisoned within my blood ... Nope, missed the bathroom queue yet again. Aunt got there first ... maybe I'll use gran's bathroom if she doesn't come out soon ... ahhh, she's out but quick social blogging first *looks around to see if sis is coming back - nope* Masako, take care and hope you get better. Me am no doctor so all I can do is pray for you no? Meia and Kaori have new layouts ... suggoi! *SCREAMS* AHHHHHH!!!! Murasaki san, no Clow and Touya please ... onegai *wails* NOOOOOOooo!!! Better go before I can't use the bathroom again, bummy hot weather. And I still can't see neko-chan's i.e. Tsukineko's blog. Speaking of which, if you're reading this ... HELLLOOO!!! *waves to Wendy and Jennifer* I'm sorry I've not been contacting anyone. Life this week is BADDDDD and I really want to ace my Jap test but as it is, making it to class in time is impossible. I get the suspicion present firm is trying to get its $ worth from me before I leave. My boss is okay but the other partners ... *Sigh* Last one to the sink is a drip!!! ... imprisoned within my blood ... Thought of the day: "All it takes to appear kind is good acting skills, But how many people are really kind?" Has it ever crossed your mind? Are you really caring and kind or is it just a mask you wear? Do you really love or are you just in love with the idea? This is coming from the person who believes that if the Montagues and Capulets had not objected to Romeo and Juliet's marriage, the stupid couple would have automatically filed for a nullity on grounds the bride was unaged and thus incapable of entering into a marriage contract, barely 2 months into married life :P Had dinner with Ros, Sab and Karen last nite. I love my junior high friends ^___^ but it's kinda odd hearing about so and so getting married or so and so having kids. I guess my emotional and mental age is still stuck at 7 ^ ^;; Byes, mum has finished hogging the toilet *runs to beat aunt to bathroom* ... imprisoned within my blood ... Ahh Reins, hellos *waves* You're welcome to use the blog here until yours gets back and up. Hmmm ... sites on hold huh? Speaking on sites, give me some suggestions - I am giving up on Envy. I'm literally trying to log on every 2 hours to try to retrieve my files and I either can't get on or I get error messages. There's either too many people trying to retrieve files or I think the deadline is up ;_; So, should I crash all the sites and start afresh or what? I'm tempted to do so and concentrate on a new site to feature parodies, fanart and my very own manga strip (see below) If I do kill off my present sites, do you want the "Ask Tats" show? Finally managed to wake up in time this morning. Slept at 3 last nite or this morning coz had many ideas on layouts for my new net' projects. Still can't decide whether to carry them out. Also, as my Jap test is in 2 weeks time, my brain was running thru lessons on auto mode. The last time this happened was when I was involved in a musical with friends ... couldn't sleep the nite before the performance as brain was mentally running thru whole musical :P But I'm glad to say that lessons 1 and 2 are safely covered ... now for the remaining 8 lessons. Thus, I'm glad I woke up in time this morning, 7:30 no less. Strange, I don't feel sleepy now but I dread the afternoon ^ ^;; Played basketball at Ghim Moh ... it's lovely with the morning glories in full bloom. I've loved morning glories as a child. I still do, but strangely I rather have the stars and the night sky nowadays. Weird? I'm weird *giggles* Got so many things I want to do, am excited but wonder if I'll finish them. I've started on my manga strip. Looks like I may abandon any hopes of finishing Demented in the near future but I plan to redo that strip nicely in the future and to finish before Tat's birthday *grins* Sooo hot now *sweats* ... I need to go bathe. People, suggestions on my dilemna please onegai??? Social blogging tonite or tomorrow ... have to get to work early *sigh* Meia, Aine and Kaori ... see you guys in a while ok? Jo, hopefully you can join us the next time. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Saturday hey guys *waves* I really have no idea what's happening with the server. *shrugs* And I can't mail host-sama about it since her mail is senritsu-based. Hmmm.... I hope Kit won't be angry about me posting this really long old post.... don't kill me, onegai! Anyway, on Feb 26 I posted this really important post... Incidently, the server went ka-thud a few hours later. ============= Feb 26, sometime after 6 pm...... WORK SUCKS. Big time. Things are happeing in my life right now.. can't say they're bad or good But I'm managing. The last three weeks at my parents' allowed me to re-examine my life... and all I havta say is I'm not satisfied with it. I came to the realization that I sacrifice a major part of my life to the Internet a lot. Without regard to my health, sanity and my future. This has been going thru my mind a lot lately.... and with what has happened at work recently, I guess this is the time to say it. The few sites and web-related projects that I maintain currently are officially STATIC/ on a hiatus. They're not dead, just static... EVERYTHING'S ON HOLD. With the exception of my weblog, or course *host-sama grumbles about reins using more of her space XD* Everything is on hiatus for an indefinate period of time. Indefinate you say? A month, or four? A year? Who knows... all I know is I need the time off. My health is not what the doctors would term a healthy one... my lethargic spells have returned, my diet sucks, and my recurring dehydration...causing my skin to crack and peel, aggravated too by my skin allergy. I am not on my deathbed, I may look healthy. But who know how long can this go on? I seriously need to get my priorities straight. I'll still be blogging (not as frequently as before though) and reading e-mails and such (pls reduce the e-mail traffic guys) but other than that, my online presence will be reduced. And on the subject of blogging, sad to say that I won't be able to change or create layouts like I did in the past until everything is resolved. This really burns me the most. Is this the end? No, just a new beginning. I'm kinda glad to make this decision. When I was back at my parent's, we talked and they have asked me to do something. Yeah, I admit it's something that I should have done in the first place, instead of goofing off. I really feel I should accomplish this and thus, earn the title of an 'adult' and so away with the apron strings.... Zoro=Eh?? What the crap is this? Masaka..... you're getting MARRIED??!! me=*SMACKS Zoro with a broom* BAKA. It's not that. Although I wouldn't mind getting hitched to you, y'know *LEERS* Zoro=GEH!! *runs away* me=Ahahahahahah!! I am gonna miss working on stuff like HTML and wallpapers..... a lot. But I need to work on ME. Yup, getting my act together.... and watching more anime XDD Guess what did I blow 200 rinngit on when I got back to work? ONE PIECE DVD SET 2 and Cowboy BEBOP box 2!!! Waahhoooo! Unlike Zee who has the complete part ONE, I have OP ep 12-52. Grrr, I missed the chance to get the first box!!! But, I loved it all the same!! I've got 1-8 fansubs anyway... Hohohohoh, can I say what a KAKKOI man Sanji is??? DANG!!! Yes, Zoro is still the man for me. But, Sanji's intro and his seiyuu.... they got the best lines!!! *squeals* So what if my DVD box set is an illegal copy which has really CRAPPY subtitles? Sanji still has the best lines... One would think Sanji was trying his very best to seduce me *_* Mochiron, kare ga tottemo kakkoi.... BUT! When he sees Nami, he turns into a gibbering git!! XDDDD Ahahaha!!! His cool image soiled!! Bwahahahaha! *awaits beatings from Lyn* Hmm.. finally the Nami-fanboy comments on my layout. Hehehehe, them kanji was lifted of a CNY card. Me is so original, eh? Hehehehe, and I got another member of the ZORO LOVE club now.... I say, make that Zoro layout Rhian! God knows I can't anymore.... I agree with ya, Lyn. I was having the same problems with the *now* static project that is my Zoro shrine. (If you wanna leave me out of it, I understand. I can't afford any time for it fot now.) Character shrines are a big thing.... a domain is even bigger. Stop when you feel like it's a chore. Then, start on it again when you're feeling fangurlish. Not all of us can be so dedicated like Val-sama and her projects... Um, Sirius or Clow? XDDDD Rei... you moved! And the layout... *_* Can I say that one is the most loveliest you ever did? K-chaaan.... can we meet soon?? I waaaant my Zoro goods.... Well... till the next blogging session. Ja! And congratulations to the Canadians for winning the gold in Men's Hockey. *waves at Meta* ....ah!! I forgot something!! I finally got Monthy Python's Holy Grail dvd!! A good friend of mine sent it to me!! Thanks you ROBB!! Run away! Run away!! heehehehe.... now that is a carniverous Killer bunny... ... imprisoned within my blood ... A horrible thought just struck me, I could have missed the deadline ... no!!!! *slaps forehead and keeps fingers crossed* ... imprisoned within my blood ... I hate my handwriting. I've always loved my mum's handwriting from young. My handwriting is a poor shadow of hers and stares like a mockery in my face. BAHHH!!! >_< ;;; So here I am trying to write out my Jap homework but my writing irritates me. Obviously I need to get my priorities right. On the other hand, I positively love ayumi hamasaki's music. There are people who look better or who have better vocal cords but for the time being, she is to me, absolutely no. 1 where Japanese music is concerned. A friend told me something yesterday, which was meant as a compliment. It's however, tearing me up inside in a way I can't understand. So sorry, all posts today will have an odd slant to them to hide their true intents. I've always loved using words with double meanings from young but have yet to master them so ... too bad for today but I've never pretended my blog was anything but an avenue for me to screech and rant, without having to see my own handwriting. Have a nice weekend all ... *goes back to trying to restore files* ... imprisoned within my blood ... Still trying my best to get my files back ... I managed to get into the server but it's not downloading *wails* Glad you're back ^__^ Reins? Tsu? Rant ahead, I'm feeling not too good: Zhen hai gock dat hou quol. Nkor tai zong yi kin qion, tai zong yi kai ke kun lai zi kea koa thim eet chak, tai zong yi duc laup. Shooi yin hod yaean hai ban duc chot wong che yi nkuck yaean but kor nkor yi quol le. Nkor mm hai dai kar sor iee wai kor yeaen. Dai kar sor iee wai gor nkor hai kor kin qion, you san gor yeaen but kor shi sut sor fei. Kark yeaen yong yi, kark kar ki zor narn lor ... zen hai hod siew. Nkor iee eim guean but kor hai eagn koi zor lork hei? But kor sen meing hai sen sor chi iee kor mai, nkor hod siong weng yin fun ze mm sang. ... imprisoned within my blood ... Friday Is anyone else attempting to retrieve their files from zerocatch? I can't seem to log on at all >_< ;; UGHHHH!!! I just want to retrieve my files before the old servers are shut down for good!!! HELP!!! ... imprisoned within my blood ... Help I'm freaked ... someone kindly wrote to me to inform me that I could restore my envy nu account. However, I also find out from the envy nu board that there is a week's time limit to restoring all old files on envy before they're permenantly killed off. Problem is I can't log in now ... envy is down. Time's ticking and for all I know I could have missed the deadline. UGHHHH!!! Can anyone help? I could rewrite my sites but hey, I rather get them back ;_; Apparently, this is my goal in life (taken from Meia). But the truth is I could do with a lot more of that!!! ... imprisoned within my blood ... Congrats to Aine, Meia and Kaori on getting your results. Yeah Aine, I got Hana Kimi 14 ... Umeda sensei *hearts* I'm even thinking of buying the Jap version for the better printing quality just for Umeda sensei *drool* ... bought a lot of other books too - Rave 11, Samurai Kyo 13, Eatman 13 etc. YnM 11 is pretty but I don't really like the way the story is going. I prefer the story with its original light hearted comic elements. How is it for you? People, want to celebrate this Sunday? I still can't find my Kare no Kano 12 and my Hana 12 and my homework oh boy ... *wails* And is it me or are Murasaki's and Rein's blogs down? I can't seem to read Tsu's too ^ ^;; Glad you're back Ruby ... ... imprisoned within my blood ... ... how long will it be before I lose control ... how long will it be before he finds me? ... oh preserve my soul, preserve my pride Preserve my sanity thru this nite ... |
