this is work in progress or homilies or miscellaneous items

that don't warrant a page by themselves

or seem to fit better here



pending poems  index



chronological order is from the bottom to the top of the page



audio files can be complemented by listening to them  with the eyes closed !


















well it's like poems, meanings shift,


words are not some fixed  “ right place ”


  autistic life


:


o


(


)
















well it's like poems, meanings shift,


words are not some fixed  “ right place ”


  autistic life


:


o


)


(
















well it's like poems, meanings shift,


words are not some fixed  “ right place ”
















crystal lance writes/replies to jeff foster


see... i just don't get this mess.

  what about all the manipulation by the dark ets?

or do you just not know about that yet!?



my reply


crystal, watching films/reading/watching the web alien paranoia

has distorted your sense of reality !


dark et's are a rubbish notion  : o )


the et crap is basically schizophrenia


lol, watch sitcoms/romantic comedies like suzanne foxton,

they are not quite as distorting as alien movies/et material  : o )


(ed. i have had some feedback that sitcoms and romantic comedies

are/can be very problematic for women)


“ in fact romantic comedies have the scientifically proven ability

(through several studies) to distort and cause more unreal expectations

about love relationships than almost anything else ”


seriously



in this work

you have to distance yourself

from entertainment to a large extent,

it just inducts moronism : o ),

music(i?)fied brains is a big problem

for the younger generation  : o )


is emily dickinson so inaccessible?

sylvia plath?  jack kerouac?  charles bukowski ?

why eat and drink at the municipal dump

when you can read these greats and me  : o )


there's a million flavours of nuttiness

and only a few flavours of getting it right,

of course the flavours of nuttiness need mass

so if you are part of providing that bulk.....
















there's more hallucinogens in a good sunset


than any amount of

  mescaline/peyote or lsd   :  0   )
















  “ birds? angels? these words registered later,

when i was writing down my recollections.

but neither of these words do justice to the beings themselves,

which were quite simply different

from anything i have known on this planet.

they were more advanced. higher forms.


a sound, huge and booming like a glorious chant,

came down from above,

and i wondered if the winged beings were producing it.

again, thinking about it later,

it occurred to me that the joy of these creatures,

as they soared along,

was such that they had to make this noise

—  that if the joy didn’t come out of them this way

then they would simply not otherwise be able to contain it.

the sound was palpable and almost material,

like a rain that you can feel on your skin

but doesn’t get you wet. ”  


that's what you need as  per  (page 2)


bacterial meningitis in the  brain !


the


crap


of


near
death

experiences


:


o


)


(


misalignment is not alignment,


but of course they will


  never know or concede   : o )

















pain makes you  philosphical


:


o


(


)


(


the confinement occasioned by  this

left eileen some time for ruminating
















 early  alzheimers  from intravenous heroin?
















  migraine

from middle french,

from late latin  hēmicrānia  meaning ‘pain in half of the head’,

from greek  hēmikrania


it's


been


around


a


while


:


o


)


(
















eileen asks


why did me being really stiff and sore in the morning

  confirm  it's  inflammation to u?

 because it shows more from being in one position for a long time?



my


reply



the immune system goes into a different mode overnight


it's naturally osteoarthritic


a good diagnostic actually  : o )


if it's worse when you first arise that's inflammatory
















life is suicidal depression  : o )
















  death's easier


( ed. reply to a somewhat black poem by jeff foster on his facebook page )


but until then,

cut back on wheat flour  : o )



add fish oil !


i guess that should be anything with wheat in,

wheat today is highly allergenic from sustained breeding

for yield, pest resistance and low perishability in storage,

but not suitability for the human gut

and it's a big problem with the modern vegetarian diet

which has become much more wheat oriented

whereas it used to be more beans and rice


of course the media and medicine and public heath advice

pushes this toxic substance as healthy  : o )


any benefits of the vegetarian diet are due to reduced iron intake imo

and it's better not to be a vegetarian, but rather donate blood as per my  advice  : o )


lower iron reduces oxidative stress,

  how ever there's trade-offs with reduced energy   : o )



----------------------



  “ early humans were hunters,

and had a physiology adapted to regular meat consumption

at least 1.5 million years ago ”



an at least 1.5ma old childs skull with porotic  hyperostosis  from anemia

















comapred to us  (now mid 50's)  at twenty ,

i think this sort of  thing  happening

  (ed. falling and bruising? a rib)

is about three times as worse


when you hit 80 it's about 10 or twenty times as worse


well i really think now about accidently damaging my self or falls


didn't used too


even my hands hitting something hard


i think it's much worse as we get older

because of a lot of misdirected inflammation


so my homebuilt  uvb lamp  will be important

  (reduces sytemic inflammation)  : o )


there's not just healing

  but some sort of inducted osteoarthritis as well,   : o )


so the healing is the net effect of healing minus new damage

  from the arthritis/osteoarthritis type inflammation  : o )


   at 20 what is three or four days to a week is four months at 56  : o )
















ok fred that's a good quote by dogen,

one gets these glimpses to see that overall

   he had a good idea of what it was about  : o )


don't get screwed up on lucid dreaming,

it is to be avoided

   and can rewire the brain increasing insomnia  : o )



“ awake/awakening and dreaming are from the beginning

one suchness, the genuine reality

the buddha dharma, even if it were an analogy,

is the genuine reality

as it is not an analogy, made king in the dream

is the reality of the buddha dharma ”



my sorta re-translation/reply


awake and dreaming are from the beginning complete!


infinity is complete !


andrew being made 7th patriarch in a vision is reality!



--------------------



lucid dreaming is just the brain not properly shutting down for sleep


some misguided people try to develop it as some sort of spiritual thing
















  on the spiritual path


it's fundamental it's self taught


  teachers are there to be used and spat out  : o )
















advaita bunnies  don't read this,  not a hard ask as you don't read anything outside

your florally painted blinkers  : o )


jeff foster, the healing problem today is getting past 50 without a metabolic disease

like pre-diabetes or diabetes !


my  views  on the   “ viral shedders ”  who make advaita groups and the like

a metabolic health nightmare  : o )


teachers like yourself almost inevitably develop metabolic diseases

from their viral exposure to these unhealthy groups of people  : o )


i even think that happened to toni packer who seemed quite physically robust,

but she ended up with diabetes unfortunately  : o (


you'll be thinking of banning me,  troy of is a fake already has

when i took him to task for his sychophantic missionizing

of the con artist and  pervert  da free john
















jack  kerouac 
















the original bugs bunny  nanabush
















oh you poor little  “ dislike ” , you brave zen souls, more like mice than men  : o )
















jeff foster, pain and isolation is the true condition and if there is such a thing as enlightenment, living with that is it and not the florid, scented fabrications of advaita


you are not celibate, but i don't think you are going to have kids and a family : o ),

you are free to get it right and let me tell you

it's very rare to get it right.....................


just start to be yourself more which is not this fake frosted sugar persona : o )
















bit of a con artist adi da (wanklin jones/da pee john),

and professional herpes spreader  : o )


the grubby details? lol, do a web search, plenty of info on

 his depraved majesty  : o )


just about all he says is self justifying crap

  he wasn't without understanding but fell short  : o )


he was a good con artist overcaught in his own con i am afraid,

it's not him i find amazing but the morons who swallow his bilge and missionize it  : o )



  “ adi da gave  herpes  to a significant number of women,


so many that it cannot be claimed to be merely an innocent accident or mistake ”


he was also a drunk and chain smoker


i lived in auckland new zealand for many years and got to know the free daisters there reasonably well,

would you like to know a bit about the  “ wife who rebelled ”   lol?


  “ for example, heather lupa would secretly bring him entire chocolate cakes to his room to binge on during a time when he claimed to be living on only raw fruits and vegetables ”  


this stuff has been on the web for years,  you true believers in wanklin jones must have a cog missing upstairs  : o)


more


his writing is unparadoxically voynich, the emporer has no clothes, it's rubbish !


what else do you expect from a sexual abuser, drug taker and alcoholic?



------------------------



reply to john christian



(ed. one of the loathsome ex adi da slimeballs that seem to inhabit the net and reduced to threatening to beat me up by way of reply, so much for your claimed sitting at the feet of gurus john  : o )


da pee john and his bunch of cronies did everything they could to conceal the debauchery and abuse that occurred, you have to be out of your mind to compare him to ramana.


john wanklin had a woman forcibly subjected to a dildo that caused severe internal injuries.. you are saying ramana did that ... jesus fucking christ you self serving shit !!!!!!!!!! she was held down by devotees!!!!!!!!!! well i guess you could do that by the sound of it !!!



------------------------



  there's something pathetic about people being conned by a dead man  : o)
















i wonder if advaita/non duality is people

who drowned in treacle

   but haven't been told : o)

















jeff foster writes


as mooji says, we all live in the same universe, but in different worlds


my reply


we are all different universes in the illusion of the same world  : o)


you got it wrong mooji!
















now according to jacques derrrida,

constructions carry the process of deconstruction in them,

which is i guess the internal inconsistencies that pull it down
















once upon a time...


actually it's reasonably  palindromic  “ time upon a once ”
















priority queues


there's


no


shame


in


not


having

a

s


much


money


just as


there's


no


glory


in


having


more


:


o


(


)
















jennifer, what jeff foster is doing is much more his life than the rest of you, you all have your various attachments and life meanings from your families


if you buy into the wrong minded blather of non-duality it's only part of your life, but for jeff to buy into what is so wrong minded and inadequate is a sorta offense to what it is about, if you want to help jeff, be way more critical, like jeff, this work is the most significant thing/one of the most significant things in my life which is why i am talking to him


basically what is created is a sort of comfort space where you are passing the time and what you object to is my disrupting it !
















women go through cycles of maximum emotional travail,


it's what they find most fulfilling



:


o


)


(
















women go through cycles of maximum emotional travail,


it's what they find most fulfilling



mp3                 SHQ version
















there's something intrinsic in favouritism that is harmful to the favourite



mp3
















“ i 'm  kind of hoping

all this excruciating

humiliating

soul laid bare stuff ”


continues forever


cause


women


love


it


:


o


)


(
















the moral of the story of abraham being instructed by god

to  “sacrifice”   isaac

is about that the selective attention of favouring

predisposes those so favoured be harmed,

they become embedded

in an unrealistically benign distortion of life

and they become too unwary

  and lack feeling for life's uncertainties and  hazards  : o )
















the number one rule is crowds are wrong


and you the individual are right,


if you don't understand that


    you don't understand anything  : o )
















schizophrenia by any other name is


advaita, neo-advaita and non duality



:


o


)


(



mp3
















schizophrenia by any other name is advaita  : o )
















enlightenment is prattling the obscure and pretending it's meaningful : o )
















the


U


N


E


L


I


G


T


H


E


N


E


D


all


arrogance


and


no


creativity


:


o


)


(
















  “deva dann”   writes


there is a zen saying


  “ when the emperor enters the crystal palace, the workers in the field burst into song and joy ”



my reply


when the emperor enters the crystal palace the workers blood is wiped off the panes?



  deva dann  replies


the emperor is awareness

the crystal palace is boundless consciousness


the workers in the fields is the physical body, immersed in daily activity



my reply


the emperor is a phoney, the crystal palace glass ware



my final reply after a particularly putrid thread of neo adviata and non-dual bullshit


so what psych meds r u on : o), this stuff is diseased !
















i need extra complexity in my life like i need a hole in my head  : o )
















what's


conveyed


is


always


distorted


except very


rarely




that's


the


price


of


it


being


conveyed



then the remembering gets distorted as well
















what's


conveyed


is


always


distorted


except very


rarely


:


o


(


that's


the


price


of


it


being


conveyed


:


o


(


)
















T


H


E



E


N


D



but it's not


or


is


it?



or


isn't?



:


o


)


(
















T H E  E N D  but it's not or is it? or isn't?   : o )

















jacques derrida at his  best  ( on prayer, starts at 5:56 )
















the count of monte cristo was alexandre dumas's  father thomas-alexandre dumas who lived a very colourful and  eventful  life, being personally acquainted with napoleon  : o )


:


o


)


(


dumas and maquet  collaborators ?  : o )    also


a bit like dorothy and william wordsworth : o)
















the modern icon of life is entertainment,  if it's not entertainment -

people don't want to know!



mp3
















brad warner writes  (30th sept 2012)


is it food poisoning or stomach flu?


i feel like i've been punched repeatedly in the gut


i doubt it's ulcers. i ate some really bad chinese food last night. then at about midnight followed that with french fries in vegan chilli. probably not a great idea. i'm gradually feeling better


thanks everybody. it was coming out both ends at around 2:30 am last night. now i feel a lot better, but still not good




my reply


brad this is why your situation is so hopeless, you can't eat like this and be competent   : o )


it's hard when you live solo, but without the biofilm carbohydrate diet  approach , you will continue to be toast  : o )


you could be at the beginning of ulcerative colitis, a possible sequelae of your extended huntingtin gene


the medical route for this stuff is a road to hell   : o )


i like the phrase one respondant to your post used  vegetarian greasy spoon  : o )


plus you are eating too late, you need at least three hours between the last food eaten and  sleep  : o )


if


you


sleep


:


o


)


(


brad looking at you is like watching a chimpanzee fall in slow motion from a two story height : o)



---------------------------



  brad's last word   : o  )



i ate cereal this morning. which means i can eat once again. horray for eating!
















men just about always successfully commit suicide,  women  hardly ever do


:


o


)


(
















a prophet is always without honour in his own country


:


o


(


)



mp3

















kafka's sisters

















everyday just goes from bad to worse  : o (
















we have sense and nonsense, philosophy is just a playing between them and doesn't really work


:


o


)


(
















  “ silence underlies everything, even our moments of deepest noisy confusion and pain. it’s always there. it is the basis of everything ”  


  “ If silence is the basis of everything, then what is the basis of silence? ”  


the above is some voynich zen crap



    of course tinnitus underlies everything


  : o ( )
















adolescent males are designed for war, i wouldn't say adolescent females were any less designed for warfare either


:


o


)


(



the problem is today's world is all geared around skills and employment, the warfare was needed because it offered  “get rich quick”   opportunites for young males to support their families and the human pyschology shows this !


that is actually what our evolutionary design is, it kept the village safe, the enemies knocked up, the population under control and sufficient resources for young breeding couples when it was needed   : o )


we are now in some  indianization ,  like what happened in india during and after the raj, the young have little money at their peak breeding ability and as a consequence children are growing up subtlely malnourished and mentally impoverished, the old are living longer and retaining resource control, infant mortality is too low to permit any genetic winnowing, the species is creeping along the path of cretinization and infirmity : o )
















insightful  article  on ray bradbury's writings


lauren  weiner

















brad  warner , you are another person who has been wrecked by zazen, you are mistaken about what it is and should be  : o )


the proof of the pudding is your censoring my posts when they are only helpful to you  : o )


you need to read the blue cliff  record  and see the greats never censored, they were always able to reply  : o (


tho i don't know of a zen master today who can reply to me  : o (


you need to catch the red cliff as well as the blue cliff and most zen people end up with the yellow  : o )


brad,   i weep that you are so screwed up about what zen is   :~~~~ o (
















vaiśravaṇa  was a  nazi ?


it's


all


the


same


human


worship


of


themselves


:


o


)


(
















vaiśravaṇa was a  nazi ?


:


o


)

















Take It Easy



Your haughty anger

And pedant revelations

Cry for a good laugh



I've been dealing with too many self important and upset people lately...so I had to vent ;)


my


reply



people of sense are

like


diamonds in the sand


one


grain


in


ten


millon


so


precious


:


o


)


(
















lol, so here we all are 50 +, life's failures except for gniz  : o )


anne mh , the usa is a nightmare for female thyroid problems, check out my  iodine  page


i really enjoy writing helpful stuff to people that they will never read or think seriously about : o )
















brad warner writes


  “ i’ve come to understand that the only way an author makes any money at all is by being famous ”



my reply


well i'm sorta famous,   unknown by 6 billion   : o )
















brad warner writes


  “ i’ve come to understand that the only way an author makes any money at all is by being famous ”


well


i'm


sorta


famous,


unknown


by


6


billion


:


o


(


)
















brad warner writes


  “ i’ve come to understand that the only way an author makes any money at all is by being famous ”


well


i'm


sorta


famous,


unknown


by


6


billion


:


o


)


(
















there's


a


lot


of


people


in


life


but


it's


a

lifetime's


effort


just


to


know


one


person!



or


is


it ?



mp3
















there's


a


lot


of


people


in


life


but


it's


a

lifetime's


effort


just


to


know


one


person!



mp3
















i don't want to dwell to much on recursion


why?


because


recursion


is


not


recursion !


:


o


(


)
















i don't want to dwell to much on recursion


why?


because


recursion


is


not


recursion !


:


o


)


(
















i don't want to dwell to much on recursion


why?


because


recursion


is


not


recursion !
















save yourself reading 1                                  save yourself reading 2
















when


they


can't


refute


you


they


remove


you


:


o


(


)
















brad, i'm doing you a lot of damage, but it's not intentional

but you are not handling it right


go with the flow man : o )
















reply to brad warners  post  since he won't let it appear on his blog


musclely shoulders, lots of male hormone?


it's amazing how talented some of these gender blurred people can be  : o )


she's got quite a good business  head   : o )


brad the problem with zen is they are all schizophrenic, broke and tight arses and just use you, which also in a way i do too  : o )


you


of


course


don't


have


the


sense

to


use


me !


that's a good post you wrote, if only there was money in this sort of thing  : o (


i should


read


what


i


write


myself


:


o


(
















thank-you for putting that  comment  up about your daughter (ed. a comment to suzanne foxton on her blog)


people often have difficulty with my perspective, but i feel that is useful advice


“autistic spectrum”  is a very powerful notion to understand life, family and the  “spiritual scene”  and not get quite so murdered by them  : o )



the flip side of the problems is that great genius is not possible without it


einstein, leonardo da vinci, monet, van gogh any great writer, artist, actor they were all on autistic spectrum


tho they are mythical stories, jesus and buddha are heavily traited with autism : o )


  life on the cross  ; o )


the advaita and  “non-dual”  icon, venkataraman iyer (ramana ) is really quite   autistic   and developmentally disabled/disordered !


years ago i read this essay by jane meyerding and found it quite useful
















man contemplating the fire of recursive  reflection  under a cloud covered moon and clear starry sky  : o )

















grigori  perelman
















dogen says


  “ breaking of the precepts having left family life (become a monk) is better than keeping the precepts as a layperson, because with the precepts of a layperson we do not realize liberation ”  


zazen is just another precept that cripples !


it's like medicine that is too strong and your life does not permit you to detoxify  : o )
















do men love


do

women


not


love?


do


women


love


do


men


not


love?
















do men love


do

women


not


love?


do


womenlovedomennotlove?
















jacques derrida  says  (3:40)


the first question of philosophy is


what is it to be ?


what


is


 being?



my reply


the


first


question


of


philosophy


is


what


is


philosophy?


:


o


(


)
















well this is the  board  of rejected lovers and those who remember and feel it  : o )

















philosophers ask


is the universe concious?


why yes! me!


:


o


)



there is me and no we ! ipso facto !





ed. reply  to
















it's not that advaita/non-duality teachers are hucksters, tho they are,  (however sincere : o ) , but that non duality/advaita is itself a huckster  : o )


the real paradigm is autism and autistic spectrum


have i suddenly lost my audience  ; o )  ?
















  “ non-duality ”   is itself a huckster, autism and autistic spectrum is what it is all really about........... suddenly lost my audience have i?
















eileen writes


i almost didn't post the  burgandy  tulip one


my


reply


funny i was just today imagining you were famous and being interviewed and i was also there as your editor and i was having to explain how you needed an editor cause you would throw your best poems away



eileen replies


Lol oh andrew


not wrong about me chucking them Lol


i just dont see them as anything but thoughts that cross my mind and why would anyone else be interested


that's all


happy just to have them on ur site



andrew replies


  people don't think or observe the same way as you , that's what makes them special