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Summary: A 155-word mid-ep
for Demons, Scully POV, set
between Teaser and Act I.
Spoilers: Pilot, Demons, and subtext-wise only, Erica
Jong's "Fear of Flying."
Rating: PG
***
He needs me.
I
call a cab as I dress and grab my overnight bag as I run
out the door.
On the way to the airport,
I am calling airlines. There is
a direct flight to Providence that leaves in ten minutes.
"Hurry!" I tell the cab
driver. He looks at me like I'm a
madwoman.
Before take-off, I book a rental car. I know the motel.
We
have stayed there before. With any luck, I can be there by
6:30. Maybe sooner.
I will the plane
to go faster. "Move!" I whisper. Eyes
closed, I am visualizing steel and fiberglass swiftly
hurtling through thin
air when it occurs to me:
I am no longer afraid of flying.
I remember our first flight
together, our first case, and
my simple fears. Some days I long for innocence and fear of
simple things again, like
flying.
I shake the feeling off quickly.
He needs me.
***
Author's Notes:
"Fear of Flying" is considered
a "consciousness-raising
classic of the second wave of feminism." Whatever you may
think of the Erica Jong's "zipless
fuck," it profoundly
influenced a generation of women by pointing out widely
shared yet unacknowledged feminine insecurities.
The theory is that identifying and analyzing one's fears
strips them of their power. But as knowledge gives
us the
power to overcome our old fears, it also destroys the
delicately balanced ecosystem in which those old fears
existed -- a world in which, along with the ignorance we
are happy to be rid of, there were also a few good things
we will inevitably miss.
The question is, would we give up all the knowledge and
power we have
gained through progress in order to also be
free of the increased responsibility that comes with it?
Most would say
no, but some days the weight of our
obligations, the burdens of our greater strength, are so
heavy that we long for
the bliss of ignorance, the ease of
weakness, and the luxury of simpler fears.
The point of this post
is to explore Scully's human side,
the woman underneath the hard veneer of duty and loyalty,
whom I am sure has her
days of doubt, too. I hope you draw
some respite from your obligations with this quick trip
down Scully's memory lane.
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