:

Publius Leget wrote Sun 8/18/19:

I give up – what was so weak about Rachel Martin's quotation?

In the first place, Emma Lazarus did not write "Give us your tired,
your poor";  she wrote "Give me your tired, your poor . . . ."   And
in the second place, she did not etch the words on the Statue of Li-
berty;  someone else did that, after she died.  And not on the statue
itself, but on a plaque beside the statue.    – Editor


Keith Durbin wrote Mon 8/19/19 @08:32CDT:

I think we need an updated picture of Wheatley!

Bring one with you to the next Breakfast Club meeting, and we'll
consider it.    – Ed.

DISCUSSION GROUP:    Don't  forget!  Readers  interested  in intellectual dissection of important cur- rent  events  are  invited  to  attend  the Weekly World News  Round  Table  at the  offices  of   Borf   Books   outside Brownsville,    Kentucky,    just   after church  every  Sunday.    Guest  speak- ers lined up for  meetings  in  the  near future include Keith Durbin.

Classic quotations of the Wheat (Simon said April 1, 2018):       "The pussy was so good that when you threw it in the air, it became         sunshine."                                                                                           – Leonard Simon

                                        "When I first came out to my family was the late '60's, and a lot of the words
                                          they have today, like 'transgender,' 'nonbinary' – they didn't have them."

                                                          – Elizabeth Coffey-Williams, on National Public Radio's StoryCorps

                    "I never thought I would start my week defending the bald eagle and end my week defending
                      the Statue of Liberty."
                                                            – Gavin Newsom, Governor of California
        "One India, one constitution."
                                                           – Indian Prime Minister Nahrendra Modi, after reimposing re-
                                                              strictions on residents of Jammu and Kashmir prohibiting their
                                                              using internet, telephone, and prescriptions, and moving
         "May God ruin him."
                                              – Muftia Tlaib, U.S. Rep. Rashida Tlaib's grandmother, of  Donald Trump

Dumb news from Indiana: Indianapolis'   north  sub- urb Carmel was spending $64,000  to  add its name to a  sign  smack  dab  in Carmel  welcoming  trav- elers   on   U.S. 31-W   to Westfield, the suburb due north,  which  cost  West- field  $300,000   (it  says "Westfield" on both sides; so motorists driving into Carmel from Westfield al- so are welcomed to West- field). . . .  A dirty diaper . thrown  out  of a car  near  Franklin hit a state police car on I-65.

[courtesy Columbus Republic]

shawanda.jpg South Bend's most wanted: Joseph Stansberry, BM, 6'0", 165 lbs, strangulation; Joshua Smith, BM, 6'2", 180 lbs,gun w/i 500 ft. of school; Shawanda Briscoe, BF, 5'6", 120 lbs, probation viol. (dom. battery); Arthur Craig, BM, 5'6", 225 lbs, coke (JMichiana Crime Stoppers)

allysonr.jpg Locked up in San Angelo (by the Tom Green County Texas Sheriff): Juan Deigo[sic]-Jaurego, WM, 20, border hold; Tabitha Smith, 41, burglary; Donna Garcia, 65, obstruct.; Krystal Griffin, 29, parole vi.; Allyson Rios, 32,con. sub.; Renee Starnes, 54, cont. subs.; Daniela Lira, 22, controlled subs.; Kaya Paulhhill, BM, 18, marijuana (Allyson found a new bun since her last appearance in these columns)

This is the winning design for a Lexington city bus by 6th
grader Polly Rink in a competition. . . .  The state Republi-
can Party held its annual Lincoln Day Dinner last Saturday,
August 17. . . .  A woman  broke into a bar  in  Georgetown
after hours and sat at the bar until employees  arrived  to  o-
pen it. . . . A  serial peeer  was being sought at a park in An-
derson County.
                                                                  [courtesy LEX18]

joenesha.jpg Lexington's most wanted: Jody Shipman, WM, 28, 245 lbs, "featured fugitive of the week," robbery, credit card abuse, unlawful imprisonment, persistent felony offender; Krista Bradley, WF, 44, 5'7", 140 lbs; not charged, just wanted (and they got her); Gary English, WM, 33, 5'9", 160 lbs., penis with ears, jism swallowing; Joenesha Hill, BF, 21,5'7", 170 lbs; wanted every bit as much as Krista (but slipperier); Bradley Myers, WM, 28, 6'0", 165 lbs, upside down ears (dragged kicking and screaming from the Herald-Leader)

         

antwondw.jpg Perps of Paducah: Antwon D. Williams BM, 41, failure to appear for sentencing; Jennifer Nell Hudson, WF, 47, burglary, mail theft; Matthew D. Connor a//a Conner, WM, 23, probation violation (felony) (McCracken County Sheriff)

Deaths:               David Koch, 79               Jeffrey Epstein, 66               Gladys M. Sallee Corhn Johnson Diaz, 86               Thelma McCarty Fiorella Lee, 90               Roberda McCubbin, 93               Earlean Nedine McKinney, 79               Carlos Allen "Lil Rican" Reyes, 1                  Jessica Anderson Zizzo, 44                                                                                          [Louisville Courier-Journal]

A family found a live green frog in a green salad they bought at a gro-
cery in North Shore, Wisconsin. . . . An irritated customer shot a wait-
er to death over slow service  in  Paris,  France. . . .  Colorado wildlife
officials were battling a prairie dog plague carried by fleas. . . . A man
opening the door to go to work in Lake Worth Beach, Florida, was bit-
ten by a kinkajou that rushed in.  . . .  A "trans" student complained of
being suspended from a Christian college in Tennessee after surgery....
An ACLU. test of facial recognition technology on police body camer-
as identified 26 California legislators as criminal suspects. . . . A feder-
al judge in North Carolina ruled in favor of lawyer George Sink Sr. in
a suit against his son,  George Sink Jr.,  for using his name at a compe-
ting law firm. . . . YouTube removed hundreds of videos of battling ro-
bots flagging them as "animal cruelty." . . . Giraffes became an endan-
gered species.
                                                               [courtesy Harper's, LEX18, AP]

jbantarc.jpg Celebrity lookalikes: James Tsui, visitor to all 7 continents; J. B. Hines, Judge, 38th District Court of Kentucky

Larry  Bird  requested  that  tattoos  be  re- moved  from  his image  on  a mural in In-dianapolis'  Fountain  Square. . . . The  artist, Jules  Muck, and her dog sit be- side another of her murals.

lifepige.jpg just sold my homing pigeon on ebay for the 22d time Life Saver Dude: 'That's one good bird'

:

J. Ewing wrote Mon 8/5/19 @12:33 EDT re the President's
mourning the slain in Toledo:

But he didn't mention the Bowling Green massacre.

Christian Tann wrote Fri 8/16/19 @11:33 CDT from Lubbock, Texas:

Hi.  I am a graduate of Texas Tech University and through Google
located a photo of me on one of your pages.   I  am  listed on your
site for receiving a Public Intoxication.  I am enquiring to find out
if you would be kind enough to take that down for me  as this hap-
pened in 2014 while I was in college and I am currently seeking to
apply for a master's program  and  this could potentially hinder my
ability to get in as well as my future job opportunities.

Try this.  By the way, it's "inquiring," not "enquiring."    – Editor

Crown Hill Cemetery objected to the requested exhumation of
John Dillinger. . . .

West Lafayette erected "Turtle Xing" signs  along Cherry Lane
at the request of an 8-year-old boy who reported massive turtle-
slaughter.
                                                     [courtesy Columbus Republic]

lorinast.jpg South Bend's most wanted: Eric Day, WM, 5'6", 135 lbs, parole violation (Nazi wannabe); Lori Nast, WF, 5'8", 245 lbs, parole viol., Yokshire hog of first order; Robert Bobbitt 5' 8", 180 lbs. parole viol. (bobbing for Y. hogs); Bobbie Jo Centers, 5'5" 150 lbs, parole iolation (bobber); Jeremy Bommershine, WM, 5'7", 190 lbs, prob. vi. (Michiana Crime Stoppers)

Gary Wade,  58,  was arrested in Lexington  for second degree as- sault after slashing another man's left chest on Corral Street  with a box knife. . . .Jessica English, 31, 5' 6", 125 lbs., is wanted in Lex- ington  for  armed  robbery. . . . Two Western Kentucky Univer-

sity students shot at what they thought was a Sasquatch in Mam-
moth Cave National Park.. . . A  Greyhound  bus  driver  using a
telephone sideswiped a semitrailer on I-75 in Rockcastle County,
injuring 17 passengers. .  . Fayette County schools, in and around
Lexington, responded to a new state law requiring display of the
motto  "In God  we trust"  in  public  schools  by  posting  photo-
graphs of dollar bills.
  [courtesy LEX18]

davidpon.jpg Lexington's most wanted:David Ponce, WM, 30, 5'6", 150 lbs, pimp daddy general; James Taggart, WM, 42, bestiality; Elizabeth Wilson, WF, 19, 5'0", 90 lbs, jilted Barry Wood; Christopher Walker, WM, 43, 6'3", 260 lbs, jacking a dog; Jordan Gibson, WM, 58, 5'11", 180 lbs, "F.U." (pulled kicking and scrreaming from the Herald-Leader)

Quotations of the Wheat:                                            "Jesus loves you, but not everybody."                                                                                                           – Leonard Simon

hollycot.jpg Locked up in San Angeloe (by the Tom Green County, Texas, Sheriff): Nathaniel Molina, 19, NOL, tresp.; Jessica Rosenthal, 26, forgery; Janessa Swinford 29, burg.; Nina Souder, 35, no bond; Maria Pena, 32, injury to child; Rebecca Blevins, 22, credit cd. ab.; Holly Coats, 20, cont. sub.

Ashley Beth Rolland, 23, arrested in Quashita Parish, Louisiana, with $6,233 and a gram of meth  in her vagina,  admitted that she had ta- ken the money from her boy friend, while he showered, but said she didn't know where the meth came from. . . . Chernobyl  was  produ- comg Atomik vodka. . . . Welsh police warn- ed internet trolls  they  could  be  prosecuted for  harassment   for  mocking  the  strangely receding hairline in the mug shot of Jermaine Taylor, 21,  wanted as a drug dealer. . . .  Ha- waii Congresswoman Tulsi Gabbard  left the Democratic presidential  campaign  trail  for two weeks of National Guard duty.  . . .  The Ohio State University filed an application to trademark the "The"  in the university name. .  .  .  A man was arrested in Largo,  Florida, for running over a group of 11 ducklings  in a puddle in the middle of the road, with their mother (two of the ducklings were pronoun- ced dead at the scene; one was taken to an

animal hospital with broken bones). . . .  The remains of a giant penguin,  as
tall and heavy as a human being, were found in New Zealand. . . .The family
of Connor Betts removed and apologized for a flattering obituary of the Day-
ton, Ohio, massacrer, which included 21 pictures (Betts had  Xanax,  among
other drugs,  in his system,  an autopsy revealed) . . .  A 31-year-old man in
Las  Cruces,  New  Mexico,  was arrested for beating up his girl friend  and
force-feeding meth to his cat. . . . A suburban Detroit, Michigan,  police de-
partment apologized to a black man it questioned after a white woman repor-
ted he was staring at her..  .  .The White House was reported to be inquiring
into the possibility of buying Greenland.
                                                                   [courtesy Harper's, LEX18, AP]

xzaviera Arrested in Abilene (Texas, not Kansas): Elizabeth Nicole Webb, WF, 43, 5'8", 155 lbs, crredit card abuse; Payton Deondre Robison, BM, 20, 5'11", 235 lbs, probation violation (robbery); Xzavier Adaire Hermanh, WM,  27, 6', 165 lbs, tattoo left calf, probation viol. (aggr. robbery, opiates); Austin Eugene Bland, BM, 21, 6', 140 bs, probation violation (burglary, kneeling on National Anthem); Nichole Paige Martinez-Paz, 26, 5'6", 240 lbs, Yorkshire hog, probation violation (burglary, robbery) (Abilene Crime Stoppers, Sedgwick County (Kansas) Sheriff, City of Waco)

             

cameronmi.jpg Wanted in Wichita Falls (Texas, not Wichita, Kansas): Cameron Minniefield, WM, 21, 5'4", 192 lbs, failure to register; Frank Ornelas, HM, 18, 5'6", 162 lbs, bond rev. (con. sub.); Mikee Phillips, BF, 33, 5'5", 105 lbs, theft x3; Quaid Landheart, BM, 30, 6'4", 175 lbs, theft (Wichita Falls Crime Stoppers)

American gold medalist fencer Race Imboden took the knee during the
national anthem at the Pan American Games in Lima,  Peru. . . . South
Korea's Lim Hyo-Jun,  short track speed skating's world overall cham-
pion, was been banned from competition for a year for  pulling  down
the pants of a male teammate in front of female skaters. . . . A 41-year-
old man choked to death in a taco-eating contest at a minor league base-
ball game in Fresno, California.

 

nolancur.jpg Celebrity lookalikes: Nolan Porterfield, Bowling Green, Ky., author of Jimmie Rodgers: The Life & Times of America's Blue Yodeler, and disk Jockey of Old Scratchy Records on public radio; Erling Geroge ("Curly") Haugland, Republican National Committeeman from North Dakota

DISCUSSION GROUP:    Don't  forget!  Readers  interested  in intellectual dissection of important cur- rent  events  are  invited  to  attend  the Weekly World News  Round  Table  at the  offices  of   Borf   Books   outside Brownsville,    Kentucky,    just   after church  every  Sunday.    Guest  speak- ers lined up for  meetings  in  the  near future include Placido Domingo.

lifeisle.jpg ialand isn't land Life Saver Dude "Makes sense to me"

:

Bruce Mitchell wrote Sun 8/4/19 @06:01 PDT:

I suspect fleas from 10,000 camels already reside in  your
beard,  since you don't pay attention.   I never said I favor
"alright," only that it represents inevitable change. It does
not matter what you or any of your sources say  is correct
or  proper;   it  only  matters  what  enters  general  usage.
Which "alright" has already done.

Who was it said it's a damn fool who  cannot  figure  out
more than one way to spell a word?

BTW, fleas cannot reside in my beard since I do not have
one.

There are two schools on "inevitable change" of language (one
of which is a "school of thought").   The first school accepts it,
unminding,  unblinking.  The  second  resists,  on the principle
the less change,  the more likely the understanding.   It's  sorta
like liberals vs. conservatives, if ya wanna go political.    – Editor

Brebeuf  high school appealed to the Vatican the Indianapolis
Archdiocese' dismissing it for refusing to fire a gay teacher.. . .

A SUV rolled by itself north of Scottsburg, killing five inside. . . .

Turns out, the request to exhume John Dillnger's body from its
grave in Crown Hill Cemetery in Indianapolis was made for  a
documentary  for satellite television's History channel,  and  the
two nephews who made the request believe Dillinger  may  not
be buried there.
                                                     [courtesy Columbus Republic]

patricks.jpg Patrick Stouffer, WM, 5'0", Terance Smity-Lyons, BM, 6"11" 195 lbs, vamily battery; Karrin Carter, a/k/a Karrin Dutt, WF, 5'5", 180 lbs, theft x2; David Pace, BM, 5'8\7", 160 lbs, burglary (Michiana Crime Stoppers)

                                         "It takes too long to work out.  It's easier not to walk by a mirror
                                           when  you're naked."
                                                                                – Richard Jeni
Quotations of the weak:
                                        "To see those, those monkeys from those African countries – damn them,
                                          they're still uncomfortable wearing shoes!"
                                                                                                                – Governor Reagan, in a phone
                                                                                                                    call to President Nixon, 1971
        "Poor kids are just as bright and just as talented as white kids."
                                                                                                                – Joe Biden
        "May God bless the memory of those who perished in Toledo."
                                                                                                                – President Strump
        "The protesters were right:  'Do something!'  And that's
          .exactly what we're going to do."
                                                                  – Ohio Governor Mike DeWine
Quotations repeated every week:
                                                        "That's exactly right."
                                                                                                 – Jeffrey Toobin, the New Yorker
     Rachel Martin:  "Thank you for your time this morning"
     Jeffrey Toobin:

Classic quotations of the Wheat (Simon said Sunday, December 24, 2017):           "My offer of a million dollars in cash and a real nice suitcase, for one night to             wallow in the mire, has gone unrewarded.  There seems to be a pattern – the             women seem to want the money up front.  Where's the love?"                                                                                                                 – Leonard Simon

Dumb news from Kentucky: A  group  of  Lexington  Christian Academy   boys   wearing  "Team Mitch" shirts posted a Clutterbook Facebook   photo   of   themselves groping  a  photo   of   Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. . . . The parents of eight   Covington  Catholic   High Schoolers  sued  native  American Congresswoman Deb Haaland  of New  Mexico  for  libel   over  re- marks she made  over  their  inter- action,highly popular on TV, with a  native  American  drummer  in Washington, D.C. (one teen, Nick Sandmann,  already  lost  a suit a- gainst the Washington Post).  .  .  .

Edmonson County's 911 system adopted texting.                                                          [courtesy LEX18]

tanjanek.jpg Lexington's most wanted: Ashley Marlen, WF 36, 5'4", 120 lbs, penny poker scam; Elisha Christopher, WF, 28, 4'10", 120 lbs, penny cosmetic scam; Wend Pendygraft, WF, 41, penny ante picayunic scam; Dealize Pinkston, BF, 43, 5'8", 185 lbs, penny pistol packing; Tanjaneka Peterson, BF, 43, 5'8", 185 lbs., pulling a "Big Mama" on a cop (pulled kicking and screaming from the Herald-Leader)

A lady hiker on Canada's Vancouver Island blasted a song by Metallica
to ward off a cougar. . . . Jeffrey Epstein was reported to want his brain
and  penis  cryogenically  preserved  (that's self-storage!) . . . Police in
West Mifflin, Pennsylvania, were looking for a woman said to have ur-
inated on potatoes in a Wal-Mart there. . . . Police investigated a custo-
mer in Port St. Lucie, Florida, who asked a Wal-Mart gun seller if they
had "anything that would kill 200 people."
                                                                     [courtesy Harper's, LEX18]

randyong.jpd Arrested in Abilene (Texas, not Kansas): Randy Young, WM, 47, 5'10" 160 lbs, filling prescriptions w/o license; Wanted in Waco: Selena D. Washington, BF, 41, 5'6", 349 lbs, theft x 3, Yorkshire hog of the year; Wanted in Wichita (Kansas, not Wichit Falls, Texas, Tynacia Johazane Brown-Hill, BF, 22, 5'2" 130 lbs, theft (courtesy Abilene Crime Stoppers, City of Waco, Sedgwick County (Kansas) Sheriff)

desmondm.jpg Wanted in Wichita Falls Texas (not Wichita, Kansas): Harley Dale Welch, WM, 31, 6'0" 162 lbs, Bond forfeiture (controlled susts.); Libni Mendez, HM, 29, 5'10:, 160 lbs, surety off bond (controlled substs.); Aniyah Talley, BF, 25, 5'3", 112 lbs, prob. viol. (ev. ar.); Michelle Cooper, WF, 37, 5'8", 170 lbs, probation viol. (aggr. ass.); Desmond Mattews, BM, 25, 5'11", 250 lbs, Prob. viol. (c.s.) (Wichita Falls Crime Stoppers, Texoma's most wanted fugitives of the week)

A 7-year-old horse died on the track after finishing a race at Ellis
Park in Henderson, Ky. . . .

                   

malloryp.jpg Basketball hottie: Mllory Pedigo, Barren Couny (Ky) Scoties: GPA 4.0

aleenade.jpg Locked up in San Angelo (by the Tom Green  County, Texas, Sheriff): Michael Bryan, WM, 21, credit card abuse; Dana Timms, 30, theft' Aleena Delrio, paraph. Taylor Phillips, 25,rhwdr; Xwxili fexi, 47, narij.; Destiny Arambula, 36; Lluvia Valenzuela, 29, marij.; Monty Parker, WM, 33

watsoncr.jpg Celebrity lookalikes: The late Charles Manson, formerly of Tennessee; Curtis Ray Watson, present escapee from the West Tennessee State Penitentiary, suspect of the murder of a female administrator there

DISCUSSION GROUP:    Don't  forget!  Readers  interested  in intellectual dissection of important cur- rent  events  are  invited  to  attend  the Weekly World News  Round  Table  at the  offices  of   Borf   Books   outside Brownsville,    Kentucky,    just   after church  every  Sunday.    Guest  speak- ers lined up for  meetings  in  the  near future include William Bottoms Jr., on trial for murder in Baton Rouge, Loui- siana.

 lifebrat.jpg Pan: "and when yoou're done grllng us to perfection we insist you serve us on ahard roll with sauerkraut, onion and dijon mustard . . . and absolutely no ketchup"; Life Saver Dude: 'Spoiled brats'

:

Bruce Mitchell wrote Fri 7/26/19 @04:53 PDT:

"Alright" looks awkward, but it is in just about every dictionary.
Get used to it.

So is "ain't".  Patricia O'Conner, in Woe Is I, and H. W. Fowler, in A
Dictionary of Modern English Usage, say, respectively:

"No, alright is not all right – it's all wrong!"

"There are no such forms as all-right, allright or alright, though even
the last, if seldom allowed by the compositors to appear in print, is of-
ten seen (through confusion with already and altogether) in MS."

                                                                                                           – Editor
And Bruce wrote Sat 7/27/91 @ 11:29 a.m.:

Tilting at windmills.  You can't fight changes in language.  It's gonna
happen whether you like it or not.  It always has.  What was standard
yesterday is different today;  what is standard today is already chang-
ing.  That's a given.

Robert MacGregor Shaw and others wrote, in 92 (plus 57) Abuses of English
That Drive Curmudgeons Crazy!:

" 'Alright' is a simple-minded combining of 'all is right.'  The inability
to see that there is  anything  wrong  with  'alright'  reveals one's back-
ground, upbringing, education,  etc.,  perhaps as much as any word in
the  language.   If you have a hard time with this one,  think  'alwrong'
and you'll be all right.   If you believe  'alright'  is  all  right,  we  hope
fleas from 10,000 camels will reside in your beard."
                                                                                                   – Editor

Two coming farmers' markets were canceled in Bloomington o-
ver white nationalist threats. . .

A woman counselor sued Roncalli High School and the Catholic
Archdiocese of Indiana for firing her because she has a wife. . . .

The Vigo County (Terre Haute) school board  prohibited  school
bus drivers from using I-70 because it was too dangerous. . . .

The Indianapolis Public Schools district was looking to shift high
school students away from school buses to city buses. . .

Elkhart Schools raised pay and offered other benefits to keep and
attract school bus drivers. . . .

John   Dillinger's  nephew  got permission from the state health
department to exhume his uncle's body interred in  Indianapolis'
Crown Hill Cemetery, where it has lain since 1934,  to rebury it
there.  No reason was given.
                                                      [courtesy Columbus Republic]

 

ezekenic.jpg Ezekiel Williams, BM, 5'6", 130 lbs, armed robbery;; Nicholas Pendergrass, WM, 5'7", 140 lbs, habitual traffic violator (Michiana Crime Stoppers)

Gunshots were fired at the sighting of Bigfoot in Mam-
moth Cave National Park. . . .

Covington High School's Nick Sandmann's suit  against
the Washington Post for libel and slander was dismissed
by a federal judge  (his suits against CNN and NBC con-
tinue).
                                                              [courtesy LEX18]

archmarc.jpg Archie Marcum, WM, 52, 5'7", 160 lbs, thug; Amnda Abshear, WF, 27, 4' 11", 130 lbs, mug; Brittany Stone, WF, 30, 5'4" 212 lbs, Yorkshire hog of the week (you can't tell by her face), bug; Cierra Dixon, BF, 19, 5'3", 140 lbs, Druggie; Tyelur Vince WM, 23: White boy whose mother let a Negro nurse spell his name, wild and crazyy guy (pulled kicking and screaming from the Herald-Leader)

Classic quotations of the Wheat (he said September 27, 2017):      "A 'K-9' companion gives a cop 'probable paws' for a search of your body or your car."                                                                                                                          – Leonard Simon

                      

marisela.jpg Wanted in Wichita Falls (Texas, not Wichita, Kansas; Texoma's most wanted fugitives of the week): Lisa Price, WF, 60, 5'8", 160 lbs, probation violation (contr. subst.); Alfrenzo Wyatt, BM, 35, 6'0", 195 lbs, bond forf. (con. sub.); Kierra Dinwiddie, BF, 23, 5'4", 110 lbs., possession of controlled substances; Justin Miller, WM, 20, 5'9", 140 lbs, probation violation (controlled substs.); Marisela Magana, HF, 41, 5'1", 150 lbs, theft (Wichita Falls Crime Stoppers)

A raw chicken breast crawled off a dish on a restaurant table in China
and jumped to the floor  (there's video). . . .  A half-Confederate, half-
U.S. flag stirred people up at a high school in Omaha,  Nebraska. . . .
A second alligator was reported at Humboldt Park Lagoon in Chicago,
Illinois. . . . Two dogs killed 29 cats at an animal shelter in Dothan, Al-
abama.  . . .  Jeffrrey  Epstein  was found on the floor of his New York
City jail cell with bruises on his neck; and his cellmate, a former New
York cop charged with quadruple murder,  said  he  found  Epstein un-
concious trying to hang himself. . . . A  woman  ordered  a  meal  at  a
Sonic in Las Cruces, New Mexico, and, when asked for payment said,
"This one's on God" (she's in jail). . . . More than 10,000 people sign-
a petition on line to establish the last Saturday of October as the date
of Halloween,  not October 31 as traditionally  (if successful,  would
they have to reschedule November 1's All Souls Day and  November
2's  All Saints Day  (and could the Vatican object?.  . . .  A Missouri
Wal-Mart mistakenly inscribed a 2year-old girl's  cake  with  "Happy
Birthday Loser" (it was supposed to be "Happy Birthday Lizard," the
girl's nickname – but both Mama and the bakery forgot to put in a com-
ma before her name). . . .
                                                             [courtesy Harper's, LEX18, AP]

laparley.jpg Locked up in San Angelo (by the Tom Green County, Texas, Sheriff): Clayton LaParl, 41, public intoxication; Amanda Elliott, 43, family viol.; Ryan Sanchez, 19, DUI; Kelli Hubble, 37, parole violation; Lydia Ramos, 54, theft; Liza Martin, 42, forgery; Monica Brown, 41, theft; Rachel Montgomery, 47, contr. subs.

 

bbanshees.jpg Bethelehem Banshees make school history; that's our girl Emma Thompson, No. 11, upper right

DISCUSSION GROUP:    Don't  forget!  Readers  interested  in intellectual dissection of important cur- rent  events  are  invited  to  attend  the Weekly World News  Round  Table  at the  offices  of   Borf   Books   outside Brownsville,    Kentucky,    just   after church  every  Sunday.    Guest  speak- ers lined up for  meetings  in  the  near future include Shibani Mahtani.