Bismillah: In the name of Allah, the Most Merciful.
Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, was a great friend of children and
father to all. Happy crowds of boys and girls often surrounded him, seeking an affection pat, a kiss, a kind word, or even
just a smile. They hoped that it might be their turn to ride on his camel, or better yet, perhaps he would playfully hoist
them onto his back–as he did with his grandsons Hasan and Husain (peace be upon them)–for a game
of horse and rider.
The love that children felt for Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) was in response
to his love for them. This love was evident in the gentle tone of his speech and in the kindness that permeated his
actions.
The Prophet (pbuh) avoided unnecessary lectures, speaking to each
individual according to their level of understanding. For children, the Prophet (pbuh) taught mainly by personal example,
offering simple, yet insightful wisdom that a child could comprehend.
Although corporeal punishment was not completely forbidden in Islam,
the Prophet (pbuh) never raised his hand against a child (nor a woman). Nor did he resort to force or humiliation. Instead,
his vision perceived the inherent goodness in another, and he encouraged this hidden goodness to blossom.
Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) understood the challenges, joys and pains of
parenthood: he watched three infant sons, and three adult daughters die before him, bearing this grief in patient surrender
and hopeful trust in Allah’s promised reward of heaven. He cherished his surviving daughter, Fatimah, as a “part”
of himself.
The Prophet’s love was not limited to his own children or to the
children of his community. When he learned that an opponent’s children had been killed in the course of battle, he was
greatly distressed. “Wars are not of children’s making,” he said, and strictly forbade the killing of any
children, no matter who they were.
Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) showed his community how to raise their children
in love and kindness. He reminded fathers of their responsibility to provide equally for all of their offspring, not only
financial support, but proper education, discipline and guidance. He commanded, in turn, that children show their fathers
respect, love and obedience.
In a rampantly chauvinistic society, Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) defended
the rights of daughters. He taught that according to the Quran, it was the Creator alone who determined the gender of a child;
hence daughters were a gift from God to be cherished, educated and protected, never forced into marriage. He promised a place
in paradise for those who raised orphaned, fatherless daughters until the age of maturity.
Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) taught that Allah had forbidden the cruel Arab
custom of female infanticide. According to this tribal custom, female infants were buried alive to relieve fathers of the
financial burden of raising “weak” girls, and of the “shame” associated with fathering daughters.
One day a man came to the Prophet (pbuh), heavy with guilt. He described
how, in the days of ignorance, he had buried his young daughter alive. He remembered her terrified pleas, “Daddy, Oh
Daddy!”, as he was covering her in sand, but how his misguided sense of tribal honour had deafened his ears. Tears welled
up in the Prophet’s eyes and coursed down his face, soaking his beard. They both knew that Islam had come to free people
from false and cruel social customs, and to extend forgiveness for those actions committed in ignorance. Yet on this day the
Prophet (pbuh) wept for the suffering of an innocent child: he was a great friend of children, and in his heart, a father
to them all.
Barbara (Masumah) Helms
(Courtesy of the Standard Freeholder, June 17, 2006, published
under the title “Muhammad was a great friend of children”)
