“Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given the one more than the other, and because they support them from their means.” (Quran 4:34)

These Quranic verses are challenging in an era where gender equality is taken as fact. Yet whereas we may all agree with practices such as equal pay for equal work, many would point out that complete gender equality–that is ‎identicalness in physique, psychology, and nature–‎has yet to be proven.

The Islamic approach to gender relations is not based on the idea of uniformity, but complementarity. Male and female are the two polar halves that make a complete soul. That their natures are complementary gives rise to the concept of mutual rights between men and women. Mutual rights are not identical rights, but reflect distinct needs and God-given natures.

Rights given to women under Islamic law were unparallel in other civilizations. Property rights, inheritance rights, divorce and custody rights were granted to women over fourteen hundred years ago, and upheld in Islamic courts. Yet the fact that the Islamic view of life contains hierarchies, including a male-female hierarchy in marriage, often puts Islam at odds with modern society.

The Quranic verse given above assigns a specific role to husbands. They are to maintain and protect their wives. This is not simply because they work to provide for them, but also because God has given them something “extra” that specifically qualifies them for this task.

Volumes have been written about this “extra” quality. Is it man’s superior physical strength, which must be used to protect his wife during the vulnerabilities of childrearing? Or has God given him a specific quality of leadership that has not been given to women?

In this ongoing discussion, at least three voices can be heard. The loudest voice has been that approach to Islamic law that focuses on what is perceived as the innate superiority of the male. This is often accompanied by discourses outlining the perceived deficiencies of women.

A second voice seeks to harmonize hierarchical gender concepts with affirming concepts of women found in religious texts and historical practice. Just and proper limits to authority are outlined, and examples of gender differences are put in contexts that highlight distinctive role responsibilities, as opposed to any feminine deficiencies.

The third and most profound voice has always sought to reconcile worldly challenges with the essential task of drawing closer to God. The many hierarchies of authority and obedience–‎not just husband-over-wife, but also mother-over-son, teacher-over-student, guide-over-follower–‎are understood as earthly tests designed to help us grasp heavenly principles.

No soul will gain transforming faith from God until it learns to surrender in obedience; this is the first step in gaining that blessed spiritual emptiness that allows the soul to be filled with the light and peace of God. To learn to respect and obey those in authority–‎not for themselves–‎but out of respect for God has long been practical training in gaining the necessary spiritual discipline for that ultimate surrender to God.

In human relationships, both the hand that gives and the hand that takes must empty themselves; the latter in surrender and obedience, yet the former by giving freely whatever benefits God has given it for the sake of the one who is entitled to receive. To use the upper hand with harshness violates the trust that comes with that position. Rather the hand that gives, must give freely and lovingly.

Islam teaches that men are the protectors of women; and they are called to hold them as a sacred trust within their protecting embrace.

 

Barbara (Masumah) Helms

(Courtesy of the Standard-Freeholder, January 13, 2007)