Season
One
Episode
1: “Pilot”
“I’ve
known you since before you were born, Joan”
This is one of the first things that God
says to Joan after she realizes Who He is. Or I should say, the first thing He says to her as God. It’s very similar
to what He said to Jeremiah, when He first called him to be a prophet: "Before
I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations. (Jer
1:5)”
It does more, I think, than just establish
Who God is. He’s telling her that He knows her, He has a purpose and a plan
Joan: Are you spying on me?
God: I’m omniscient, Joan. Comes with the job.
It always baffles me when people on shows
like this can get their heads around the fact that they’re having conversations with the Creator of the universe, and
yet still have trouble grasping a concept like omniscience. They seem to swing randomly from statements like this to “You’re
God, aren’t you supposed to know this already?”
But I guess it’s like anyone who
insists on understanding God in their own terms, the way some skeptics may ask “If God is real, then who made Him?”
Since we live within the boundaries of time and space, and since we all have a beginning and an end, we insist that everything
must also be limited by time and gravity and physics.
These were possibilities that I learned
to consider at a very early age, not from church, but from watching Star Trek.
Joan: Old Testament, Tower of Babel, burning bush, ten commandments….God?
God: I come off a little friendlier in the New Testament
and the Koran, but…yeah, same God
Not to be critical, but it’s difficult
to understand how God comes off better in the Koran than in the Old Testament. But whatever. And isn’t it ironic that
none of the things Joan mentions are even the harsh judgment and wrath things in the Old Testament, like the flood and the
Battle of Jericho and Sodom and Gomorrah…
Joan: And I’m supposed to believe you because…?
God: Because you have a feeling
God
tells Joan that she made a promise to him to let his brother live after a debilitating accident, and that she didn't keep
it.
“You
notice how I’m not answering any of the whys?”
When we talk about God, we usually start
with two assumptions: One is that He knows everything, and two is that we don’t. Part of our nature is that we only
see what’s directly in front of us or around us, and how these things directly affect us. Part of God’s nature
is that He would seem to exist outside of time and has a better view: He not only sees the beginnings and endings, but He
sees them all at once. And if all that’s true, He would see how one thing I do affects not only everything else that
I do, but how those things affect the people I encounter, and how everyone’s lives shape and mold the lives of everyone
else’s. It’s a principle that runs throughout Buddhism, string theory, and every single episode of Quantum Leap.
Wouldn’t it be kind of arrogant,
then, to only follow God when you could see immediate results?
“I
don’t look or sound like anything you’d recognize”
“It’s
not about religion, Joan. It’s about fulfilling your nature.”
Joan: Let’s see a miracle!
God: Ok….how about that?
Joan: That’s a….tree….
God: Let’s see you make one
“I’m
not appearing to you. You are seeing Me.”
God
tells Joan to get a job at a specific bookstore.
(The
great physicist Faraday “Nothing is too wonderful to be true”)
(Why
does God let people suffer?)
Episode
2, “The Fire & The Wood”
“Free
will is one of my better innovations. I give suggestions, not assignments”
“Stop
squandering the potential I gave you”
“Humility
isn’t actually humility unless you’re good enough at something to be humble”
“People
ask me to do things. Big things, little things, billions of times every day. I put a lot of thought into the universe, came
up with the rules…it sets a bad example if I break them. Not to mention, it shows favoritism. Why should one person
get a miracle, and not everyone else? Can you imagine the confusion? It’s better when we all abide by the rules. Miracles
happen within the rules. That’s why I came to you. You’re an instrument of God, bound by the limit of time and
space. Perfect. By the way, as an instrument of me, have some pride. Do better. Do your best.”
“News
flash, Joan: You don’t need to let Me in on your thinking process. I’m omniscient.”
“I
want you to fulfill your true nature.”
“You
won’t always know why I ask you to do things. You won’t always see the effects. Just think about what you learned
in AP Chemistry: The smallest catalyst can set off mind-boggling chain reactions.”
Joan
joins AP Chemistry, which brings Adam Rove into her home, and he tells Joan’s mom about a used car for sale, which she
then buys for Joan’s brother…Adam meets Joan’s dad (the police chief), who then feels obligated to exchange
niceties with Adam’s father, who then passes on his inflated impressions of Joan’s father to his counterpart at
the fire department, who tells that to his brother-in-law (an arson investigator) who then risks his job to get information
to Joan’s dad about an arsonist….
“’Better’
is how it works with Me, Infinite Good in an infinite universe.”
Episode
3, “Touch Move”
God
tells Joan to play Chess
Joan’s
mom asks the priest in the parking lot if it’s wrong to pray for a miracle…the priest says “I think prayer
can never hurt, as long as you understand that you may not recognize the answer right away. Most miracles occur in hindsight.”
God
tells Joan that she won a chess match because her opponent was using logic, and she wasn’t. “It’s impossible to guard against chaos. It’s rare, but it happens.”
“It’s
a causal universe…It’s not about punishment. It’s that actions have consequences, and to be in denial about
that is to disengage from the laws of the universe which renders you powerless, and vulnerable to an inordinate amount of
pain.”
People talk about suffering like it’s
unjust punishment, and use that as an excuse not to believe in God.
But think of it this way: If I tell my
kid not to put his hand on a hot plate, and he doesn’t listen to me, is it punishment that his hand gets burned? And
does it mean that I don’t care about him that he suffers because of it?
“The
number one rule of chess is, don’t play the other person’s game. Play your own.”
Episode
4, “The Boat”
God
tells Joan to build a boat
“Sometimes
one talent, is all talents. Everything that rises must converge.”
This one I don’t get.
“The
thing about fear is that it doesn’t leave room for anything else, like beauty, purpose.”
(When
Joan tells God not to pop in on her): “I don’t pop. I abide.
I’m eternal. There’s no popping.”
(When
Joan asks if she can tell Adam about her conversations with God): “Just
remember that it’s a burden asking people to believe you.”
“Burdens
sometimes look a lot like gifts.”
Episode
5 “Just Say No”
When
God talks to Joan in front of her brother Luke, Joan says “Why didn’t he see You?” God says “He did. He just didn’t notice me. That happens a lot.”
This kind of goes back to what I’ve
always said about how some people believe and some people don’t. It’s not a matter of proof or evidence, and it’s
pointless to argue or debate, because everyone sees the same evidence. Everyone reads the same words from the Bible, sees
the same stars in the sky, has the same conscience telling them right from wrong. Everyone knows what pain is and what causes
it, everyone knows what joy is and how to spread it. And yet some choose to believe and some don’t. Some choose to see
God and some don’t. It doesn’t make anyone better than anyone else, and I don’t believe it makes God like
some more than He likes others. It’s just that, in the end, we all have exactly the relationship with God that we choose
to have.
God
tells Joan to have a yard sale.
“I
don’t care much about time. That’s one of your innovations.”
“Here’s
what I’m wondering, Joan: When are you going to get it? That whenever I ask you to do something, it’s for your
benefit.”
“It
says a lot about a culture that it never felt the need to build walls [around its cities]”
“When
you have a mood you eat French fries, but when you have pain it takes a little more work to deal with it.”
Joan
asks God about what happened to her mother. God says nothing. Finally she says “How bad was it?” God says
“It was evil. And I don’t throw that word around.”
Episode
6 “Bringeth It On”
God
tells Joan to try out for cheerleaders.
God
tells Grace “Thank you, young man,” which seems a little out of character for God to be snarking like that.
“I
work in mysterious ways”
About
Joan skipping class to go with the cheerleaders: “What is it with you
people? I give you very simple instructions and boom! You’re right back to false gods!”
God: “Don’t miss any more World History.
You’re just in time for the crusades.”
Joan: “Like it’s really good for me to be
learning about people butchering each other for a hundred years just because they believed in You!”
God: “That’s not about faith, that’s
politics. It’s sort of like the difference between friendship and popularity.”
Episode
7 “Death Be Not Whatever”
“Work
is a spiritual exercise. It keeps things moving along, prevents stasis, builds character. Most of all, the point of working
is to help”
“You’re
about to realize that you’re going to be in a position to help someone. You have to look at behavior. Not everyone knows
how to ask for help.”
The
priest points out to Joan’s mom that although Kevin didn’t die in the accident that left him in a wheelchair,
in a way, she was grieving the future that she had imagined for her son. Then he quotes Kierkegaard: “The most painful
state of being is remembering the future. Particularly one you can never have.”
Rocky to Joan: Death is a natural part
of life. Why does it scare you?
God
tells Joan that what Rocky has is not asthma. “He tried to tell you
what it is, but you ignored him. I understand why: You don’t want to look at anyone’s pain. The trouble is, when
you try to avoid it, you stop helping. [That’s how] people end up alone.”
Joan (about having to help so many people): Where does
it end?
God: “It doesn’t. Help kind of moves around,
like light. Even a little bit is good”
“You
see Me as you want to see Me, Joan. Like right now you’re mad at Me. Maybe you feel safer being mad at Me when I look
like this.”
“There’s
nothing I could say about [death] that would make sense to you.”
“Life
hurts because you feel it, Joan. Because you’re alive. Your love for people, that generates a lot of power, a lot of
energy. The same kind of energy that binds atoms together. And we’ve all seen what happens when you try to pry them
apart.”
“It’s
in your nature to get attached to people. I put that in the recipe. It’s when you guys try to ignore that, when you
try to go it alone, that’s when it gets ugly. It’s hell.”
Episode
8: The Devil Made Me Do It
Be
more physically active.
“Why
are people always trying to discern my deeper meanings? This is the kind of thinking that starts wars. Stop it.”
“All
styles are my style”
God
tells Joan to make sure that Adam’s sculpture doesn’t get into the art show, but Joan doesn’t want to
Rabbi Polk: Yetzi Harah – our own
inclination towards evil that comes between us and God. Yahtzi Hara thrives on moral confusion. You act with righteousness
and you act with kindness and you use Yahtzi Harov, your own good inclinations
“It’s
not really faith if there’s no crisis. Faith is an act of will, not of feeling.”
“There
are no dilemmas without confusion, there’s no free will without dilemmas and there’s no humanity without free
will. “
“What
you have to ask yourself is, what are you going to do now? That’s what I’m all about, your next chance to do the
right thing. That’s how you know I’m who I am. That’s how you shall know me from all others. What are you
going to do now? Every new decision is another chance to do the right thing. You don’t get that from the other side.
It’s all about what you do next.”
Episode
9 “St. Joan”
In
class, Joan’s teacher postulates that Joan of Arc was paranoid schizophrenic
“History
is important. Last spring, they didn’t cut the branches back. This summer they had too much shade. Now they’ve
got too many leaves, and the grass is dying. They have to replant the lawn. That’s what happens when you ignore history.”
“I’m
not really here to discuss martyrdom with you, Joan. Like most things having to do with Me, it’s complicated. “
“Here’s
the thing you need to learn from the martyrs, Joan. They did it the hard way. That’s what I’m asking of you.”
Episode
10, “Drive, He Said”
“Being
an adult isn’t merely about risking your own well-being: It means risking others’. In cars, in love, in family,
hurting others is always a possibility. That’s what’s difficult about being an adult., facing the harsh fact that
you may hurt others even when you don’t want to. It might help if you think of the universe as an obstacle course: There’s
no flaw in the design, it’s just….obstacles…”
Episode
11, “The Uncertainty Principle”
“Evil
is not a word to use lightly. It’s only the darkest end of a broad spectrum. Exactly like light. Nobody’s born
in total darkness. Most people live on the grey end of the spectrum, like jealousy, wrath, but you only get to absolute evil
by doing one thing after another, so that eventually it transforms.”
“Almost
everybody has some light somewhere, and life is always worth fighting for.”
Episode
12, “Jump”
God: “Death is a dividing line”
Joan: “I don’t need God to tell me that death
is a dividing line, everybody knows that. What we don’t know is what it divides us from.”
“I leave hints all over the place. I’m all
about hints.”
“Some
suicides are motivated by rage, at another human being, the universe, or Me. Others come from a deep sadness, suicide seems
like the only way of stopping the pain. And then there are those who do not end their mortal lives, but still they stop living,
which is also a kind of suicide.”
“There’s
more than one way to talk to people who aren’t here anymore. There’s definitely more than one way to listen.”
Episode
13, “Recreation”
God
asks Joan to have a party.
God doesn’t say anything profound
in this episode, but there is one of the coolest plot twists on this show: God tells Joan to have a party while her parents
are out of town. Two cops are about to rush into a meth lab, but instead they go investigate a noise complaint at the Chief
of Police’s house, whom they know to be out of town. The meth lab blows up and the cops live, all because Joan had a
party while her parents were out of town.
Episode
14, “State of Grace”
God
asks Joan to join the debate team.
“So
you think believing something to be true makes it true? I don’t exist because people believe in Me, I simply exist whether
people believe in Me of not. Hanging onto beliefs, that’s not truth”
God
draws a distinction between beliefs and truth.
“Do
you know the meaning of Grace? It’s a touch of truth that lets you see the world in a new way. It’s a gift that
can only be felt when you’re open enough to accept it.”
Episode
15, “Night Without Stars”
God
wants Joan to work with children.
“I
work in mysterious ways, Joan.”
“Everyone
has a part of themselves they don’t like, Joan. You carry it around like a weight. The lucky ones realize that when
it becomes too heavy, you can choose to set it down. That’s when you can see things the way they really are.”
Episode
16, “Double Dutch”
God
tells Joan to jump rope
“You
think your connection with her is gone just because she went away? Real connections – they can’t be broken by
time or space.”
“You
can’t fix everything, Joan.”
When
Joan wants to know what happened to her friend, God won’t tell her. All God says to Joan is “Sometimes it’s enough to plant the seed, and walk away. Let the flower grow on its own.”
Episode
17, “No Bad Guy”
“I’m
amused by harmless pagan rituals. Not so much by bloodletting.”
“Repeating
myself is part of the job. Vengeance is mine, sayeth…Me”
God
wants Joan to join the band
Episode
18, “Requiem For A Third Grade Ashtray”
Joan to God: For someone who’s almighty,
You’re very passive-aggressive
“Growing
up is scary”
Episode
19, “Do The Math”
Take
piano lessons
Luke: All music is based on the mathematical
certainty that vibrations change when the ratio between whole numbers change.
Episode
20, “Anonymous”
“I’ve
supplied everything you need for a perfect life”
Work
at the yearbook
Sewer Walking
You
and me, we used to talk, like a river underground
The
sewer where we used to walk
The
hole at the end, empties out to the pier
Where
paper boats disappear
Me,
I try to send this note
Float
it like a paper boat
But
paper sinks, and words are weak
I
try but I don’t speak
“Do
you know who carved the façade of Notre Dame cathedral? Or the sculptures at the Parthenon? No one knows. Their names are
lost to everyone but me. But does that make their creations any less beautiful? Who you are is enough, Joan. You’re
a searcher. You try, and you fail, and you try again. Stop hiding who you are.”
Episode
21, “Vanity, Thy Name Is Human”
“Good
is relative, beauty is relative, everything is relative, except for Me, I’m Absolute.”
“Perspective
is everything. The way the world sees you can change the way you see yourself.”
“Sometimes
you have to see what you’re not, in order to see what you are.”
“Everyone
has a best feature, Joan. I saw to that.”
“The
thing to remember is, adornment isn’t who you are.”
Episode
22, “The Gift”
“Giving
isn’t about things. A gift is an offering.”
“Diamonds
are just carbon, the same element that makes the graphite in your pencil. People have endowed it with value.”
“A
gift is an offering, a selfless act that adds something to someone’s life, something that they need, and only the two
of you can decide the value of that gift.”
“Hints
are everywhere, Joan.”
Helen to Luke: Feelings affect behavior,
which in turn affects behavior, which, as Heisenberg taught us, affects reality.
Grace:
The act of giving makes you love the person more. The Hebrew word “to give” has the same root as “to love”
“You’re
always faced with difficult decisions. I can’t make your choices for you. I’m really committed to that free will
thing.”
“Faith
is believing when there’s no rational reason to believe, like you’re seeing Me, who would believe that that’s
rational? Yet you know that it’s true. You’re the one who has the faith, Joan. Find a way to give a little to
Adam.”
Episode
23, “Silence”
Joan
is diagnosed with Lyme Disease and begins to believe that she’s imagined God all along.
God speaks to Helen in a dream: “[Joan]
is open to possibility. That’s my favorite instrument…Just be open to possibility. That’s all I ask.”
This is probably the thing I’ve taken
away from watching this show that I remember the most in my day-to-day life. Probably because there’s so much to it,
and the more I think about it, the more it means.
To really be open to possibilities, you
have to be able to admit that you don’t know everything. It means you have to give up all of your own expectations,
and all of your plans for the future, and even all of your own ideas about how the world is put together.
Like, I always had my own ideas about God
and Who He is and how He works. Mostly those ideas weren’t based on how I’d experienced God, but on what other
people told me. But I really believe that to experience God, I had to give up some of those ideas. I had to be willing to
accept God as He revealed Himself to me, outside of whatever Church I went to or what some preacher told me the Bible said.
“Sometimes
you can’t believe what you see, so you have to trust the world behind your eyes.”
“People
manage to believe in Me, even though they have no idea What I am. They trust Me, even in the silence.”
“My
name is I Am, not I Was.”
Will
is speaking to a woman whom he believes had a near-death experience, and asks her about the light and the tunnel, to which
she replies: “You’re asking me if I saw God? You don’t have to die to do that.”
This is kind of what McCoy said to Spock
at the beginning of Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, after Spock had come back from
the dead
When
faced with multiple incarnations of God, Joan asks how could they all be there at once, to which Emo God responds “How could we be here at all, Joan? That’s the question to ask.”
When
Joan tries to tell Adam about her conversations with God, it all comes out wrong and just confuses him.
The
episode (and the first season) ends with Joan saying that God is not real, and the young boy-band God comes to her bedside
looking kind of sad
