Why do we press harder on a remote control
when we know the batteries are getting weak?
Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient
funds" when they know there is not enough?
Why does someone believe you when you say
there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?
Why do they use sterilized needles for death
by lethal injection?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest,
but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Why did they put an "S" in the word
"lisp"?
Why is it that no matter what color bubble
bath you use the bubbles are always white?
Why is there never a day that mattresses
are not on sale?
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator
with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
Why do people keep running over a string
a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one
more chance?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from
the end on your first try?
Why do those bugs go into those enclosed
light fixtures and not leave the same way they got in before they die from the heat?
When we are in the supermarket and someone
rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right,
so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch
something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
Why in winter do we try to keep the house
as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
Why do you never hear father-in-law
jokes?
And my FAVORITE...
The statistics on sanity are that one out
of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends... if they're okay .
. .
why don't you know it's you?
