Law of Mechanical Repair:
After your hands become coated with grease,
your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.
Law of the Workshop:
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to
the least accessible corner.
Law of Probability:
The probability of being watched is directly
proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of the Telephone:
If you dial a wrong number, you never
get a busy signal.
Law of the Alibi:
If you tell the boss you were late for
work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
Variation Law:
If you change lines or traffic lanes,
the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now.
Law of the Bath:
When the body is fully immersed in water,
the telephone rings.
Law of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you
know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result:
When you try to prove to someone that
a machine won't work, it will.
Law of Biomechanics:
The severity of the itch is inversely
proportional to the reach.
Law of the Theatre:
At any event, the people whose seats
are furthest from the aisle arrive last.
Law of Coffee:
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot
coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
Murphy's Law of Lockers:
If there are only two people in a locker
room, they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Floors:
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich
landing face down on a floor are 1 to 1.
Law of Logical Argument:
Anything is possible
if you don't know what you are talking about.
Brown's Law:
If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
Oliver's Law:
A closed mouth gathers no feet.
Wilson's Law:
As soon as you find a product that you
really like, they will stop making it.
