I think this is what that Jung guy talked about, how our basic human motivators are power and control...which really when you think about it is just one motivator. Freud said everything was about sex, which is way cooler to think about, at least until he started talking about your mother and then it just gets all gross and wrong. So very, very wrong. And all of that just goes to show that folks can believe in all the dumb crap they want to, but that doesn't make it true.

 

Anyway, as twisted and freakish as Freud was, that's really not the point. The point is, really, that everyone wants control, everyone wants power, everyone wants to be the Boss of everyone else. It's why people become prison guards and watch I Dream of Jeannie. We talk about rights and liberties and freedoms, and these are all good things as far as they go, or at least they mostly are, but the truth is that individually we have very little power or control.

 

Take the weather. Basically, the weather is the wind, and how fast it's blowing (or not) and in which direction; and water, and whether it's falling from the sky and in what degree of solidity. It doesn't seem like there's all that much to it, and yet we spend hours and hours every day talking about it and predicting it (or not), and people study it and measure it and just generally freak out about it.

 

I think the reason we devote so much time to the subject is because we have no control over it. If we did, and if we could say when and how much it would rain, or how fast and in what direction the wind would blow, it wouldn't be such a big deal.

 

But it would totally suck. I mean if every city or state or even country had its own Bureau of Weather that decided what kind of weather they had, everyone would always be fighting over it. Places with beaches, like Australia, would always hog all the sunshine, and places like Canada would be all pissed. And then all those Middle Eastern countries would send tornadoes and stuff to other countries, even if it meant they had to flood their own country.

 

And since weather is basically just wind and water, like I said, pretty soon someone is going to figure out a way to screw with that, too, so that it would start raining fire, or rocks, or cows. I'm not thinking that would be a good thing, either. Even if some kid started making it rain milkshakes or something, it would get all sticky and gross. I think it's good that we have no control over the weather, because it seems to me the more we get control over things, the more we screw them up.

 

Not to get preachy, but in a way this could be viewed as evidence of the existence of God: It kind of shows how things are put together so well, or at least a bajillion times better than any of us could ever have put them together.

 

Some people don't get it at all. They scramble around like monkeys trying to get control over everything they can in their lives. And while it's true, at least in this country and most of the Western hemisphere, that we might have some success in controlling where we work or what we watch on TV or how we spend our money, we still all have to pay taxes and we can't control what other people think of us and we all still get sick, and the neighbor's dog still gets on our yard. And so these control freaks start getting all frustrated and they're like monkeys that start screaming and throwing things. They beat their wives or run down the jerk that cut them off in traffic.

 

In the interest of equal time, then, I should point out that this uncanny similarity to monkeys could be viewed as evidence of Darwinism.

 

It's kind of like those guys I knew in high school who would date these really great-looking girls and always be telling them who they could talk to and where they could go and what they could do, and get jealous if she even looked at another guy. It's they didn't want to date her, they wanted to own her. And then they don't even want to own her anymore, they want to control her, and be inside her head, and invade her soul, and devour every inch of her. And if all this sounds unhealthy and sick and freakish, then consider that a good thing. But if it sounds reasonable and it brings to mind a crush you once had on someone, or if you've ever heard Angelina Jolie talking about wanting to "take a bite" out of Billy Bob Thornton and thought it sounded "cute," or if you're relating to this in any way, please get help. Please, for the love of God. Hopefully something that requires massive electrical shock.

 

If it sounds like i understand this behavior, it's only from observation and not from experience, because I totally don't get it. Does it never occur to one of these co-dependent monkeys that you never hear anyone wistfully reminiscing about stalking someone, or that there might be a reason for that? It's because they usually wind up bitter and alone, or in jail.

 

It seems really incongruous that these folks get "love" and "wanting to beat someone up" confused, and I just don't see how you can get from Point A to Point B. Or I should say, I don't see how you can flip back and forth between the two. It would be like someone so severely retarded that they can't tell the difference between a bird and a turtle, or they keep getting the two mixed up.

 

They're kind of like foreign exchange students who come to your class and just to screw with them you say that in America, if you like someone, it's customary to pee on their shoes or tell them they have a face like a pig. Except that even most foreign kids would never actually do it, and even if they did they'd figure out real quick that they should never do it again. Because somewhere along the line these codependent monkey guys got the notion that if you love someone you should beat them up, and they never seemed to catch on that this is not just wrong but incredibly stupid.

 

So it all comes back to wanting to control people, which is extra stupid when you consider that these folks can't even control themselves.

 

Anyway its what I think.