The Rand Paul mask! Order! Discounts What’s new

Coming soon! The Who Cares Bears!


to get any item send check, cash or money order to:

Borf Books
Box 413
Brownsville KY 42210


You used to be able to buy from us via PayPal, and to buy our stuff from; but it appears now that both have fallen to the

Taco Bell syndrome:

Natty Bumppo and his son, then 10 years old, walked into a Taco Bell on the U.S. 31-W Bypass at 12th Avenue in Bowling Green, Kentucky, one day, about 2 p.m., hungry for lunch.  They were the only customers in the entire place – dining area and counter.  There were four employees behind the counter, chatting with each other.  As Bumppo and his son approached the counter, the employees continued to chat with one another, without recognition of their customers.  When the Bumppos got to the counter, nothing changed.  “Do you not want my money?” Bumppo yelled, embarrassing his son.

Apparently they did not, as they yet paid no attention.  The “Taco Bell syndrome” is not wanting your clients’ or customers’ money.  Lately both PayPal and have made it so difficult for their clients and providers to maintain registrations that it is clear that they no longer want our money (they got a cut, after all, of everything we sold).  So now we’re on our own.

Orders shipped, by first class mail,
within 24 hours of receipt (48
hours if Sunday or holiday in-
tervenes): You should get
your order in a week or less.

Free excerpts of all Borf books
available on line! (see by title)

Hank T. Hebhoe
, publisher
Natty Bumppo, writer & editor *

Guestbook: Sign View

All  prices  include  first class air mail postage
and any sales taxes that may be applicable.
Telephone or e-mail us for shipping cost on mul-
tiple volume, wholesale and discount orders.

Add 60 postage for fewer than six bumper
stickers or 12 postcards. For half a dozen
bumper stickers send $5.87 total (includes
postage). For a dozen postcards send
$2.87 total (includes postage. All
bumper sticker and postcard orders
are mailed first class, not media rate).

How to find us on a map:
Visit our “Webb site

Wholesale (not just for bookstores): You get 40% discount on purchase of five books or more
(any title or combination of titles), but shipping is additional. Call or
e-mail us for exact quote.
For a 5% retail discount, print out your favorite Borf web page and mail it with your order!

*Read the latest nasty letter from Natty Bumppo! (March 9, 2004)

* The newest Borf books – Steve Amm, Me, & Them Other People, A Rug Before My Time, The Columbus Book of Euchre (Second Edition), The Sackbut Tapes, War Stories, "Dear sir (you cur):" and Jadwiga Stories – are complete desktop publications – composed, printed and bound in our small offices in Brownsville, Kentucky. So are our postcards and bumper stickers.

One reviewer of The Indiana Torture Slaying – although he gave the book five stars – referred to the printing as “home made,” and the cover as made of “construction paper. You can call it “home made,” or you can call it “hand crafted”: Whichever, we have found a way to reproduce – economically in limited editions – books high in demand but not in a mass market.

And because the books are not printed in bulk – a typical press run is four copies, and printing runs only slightly ahead of purchase orders – slight additions and corrections can appear in later printings. And any buyer who feels shorted by an earlier printing can get a free update, as explained in the back of each book.

And the covers are not made of “construction paper”: It’s 80-lb. red vellum, which costs us more than $40 a ream. It’s not “slick,” but it’s a stock of higher quality than used in the binding of many mass market paperbacks.

Coming soon! The Who Cares Bears!

* Grumpa Bear
* Grimma Bear
* Little Miss Pouponia Bear
* Little Crappypants Bear
* Grinnin Bearit
* Snarly Bear
* Asif I. Carebear
* Askmeif I. Carebear
* Well Who Cares About It Anyway Bear
* Who Gives a Rat's Ass Bear

“Over hamburgers sold!”