  |
|
|
|
|
naAMnet Daily Flyer
|
|
|
*33(b) Reflection
|
|
|
|
|
|
Read Previous Part-33(a)
Jedi Nights
33 – b
Reflection
I had nearly completed my preparations when my husband woke up saying, “Dhan Guru Gobind Singh Sahib, Dhan Guru Gobind Singh
Sahib”.
It took him a minute to get his bearings. He jumped up. Seeing me at the door in
military regalia seemed to revive the spring in his step. The spark came back into his eyes.
He looked like my lover again.
He came to me up and took me by the
shoulders. He gently pushed my shield to one side and the Siri Sahib to the other, then took me into his arms. I melted into
his embrace, snuggling into his raggedy, dusty, crusty, bony frame and murmured, “I missed you”.
He stepped back, still holding onto me, “I *love* you, and I LOVE Guru Gobind Singh jee. And guess what, he still
loves me!!”
He danced a little bit confiding, “I had a vision … or a wonderful dream.
I
lay on the floor in an extremely cold room next to a fireplace. Several other people with children huddled close to the fire
warming themselves, while looking down upon me with pity in their eyes. One child cried out in pain when his hand got
burnt by the fire. His father came running in from the outside. He first harshly scolded him, but then embraced him warmly
and closely. Then the father looked down at me and it was none other than Guru Gobind Singh jee! He recited kir aupdysu iJVky bhu BwqI bhuiV ipqw gil lwvY!
Yeah, it’s true I have royally screwed up.
But hey who doesn’t once in a while?” This
was more like my husband - he always took things in stride, nothing ever got him down for too long.
I asked him, “So what is your plan?”
“Well!” he replied quite importantly, “The
first thing I have to do is retrieve my Sri Sahib from a certain woman who stole it from me while I was sleeping in her bed!” He took the Sri Sahib from me and put it back on, “And then I am going to eat many delicious pranthas made
by that same woman and then I am going to go kick some moghul butt! Isn’t that a great plan?” I nodded with happiness!
Hearing this exchange Pita Jee knocked at the door and came into the room. My husband just flung himself at Pita Jee's feet. “Please forgive me, father. I am your most ignorant child!”
Pita Jee, patted his head apologetically and replied, “I spoke harsh words out of despair, son! I hope you forgive a foolish,
raving man!” They hugged each other
for a long time.
We got moving quickly after that. While my husband bathed then stuffed himself
with quite a few potato stuffed pranthas (a few too many perhaps, if you ask me, to load into a belly that had gone so long
without food). The children woke and came sleepy-eyed into the room. Not
at first recognizing their Father, they soon squealed delightedly climbing into his lap. They soon became quiet awestruck
by tales about the great feats their father had accomplished in the company of the world’s greatest warrior.
As we rearranged his packs, stuffing in even more dry food in hopes he could slip
back into the Fort, we heard a knock at the door.
The Jathedaar who had presented the bedava to the Guru stuck his head through and
looked around. He was a charismatic man and I felt sure that he had played a big part in arranging the 40 Singh’s
“release”. I cautiously greeted him, not wanting him to change my husband’s mind. He asked me,
“Where is Bhai Sahib?”
Had his
tone been less jovial, I would have sullenly kept quiet or given him a piece of my mind. Something in his demeanor imparted
to me his change of heart. I could tell we all belonged to the same “side”. I told him everything. He smiled and announced, “All
of the Singhs are going back I just wanted to let him know that we will be leaving in an hour!” He turned to go.
I called after him, “Wait! Jatehdaar jee, what changed their minds?”
“Oh,” he replied, quite eager to talk, “One
thing or the other. For me personally, Mai Jee came and inspired me. Well,
actually …Once I arrived I felt like the lowest and filthiest most cowardly creature to ever walk on this Earth!
Mah Ji scolded me reminding me that I am a Singh worth 125,000 ordinary men. I
knew her to be a stalwart gursikh, but I never realized how deeply imbued with Naam she was - each of her words pierced straight
like an arrow into my heart.
And her punctuation, haha, my head barely missed her rolling pin,” he laughed, “She told me, “You sit here at home and make the roti and
we women will go in your place. We will return with food for our brothers and weaponry to fight with and give our lives if
necessary” I realized that I could make a difference by returning. I couldn’t talk her out coming along
too. I pity the moghul who crosses her path!”
he laughed again.
He turned a little serious, “To tell you the truth, Bhen Jee, even on the way “home”, many of us already deeply regretted leaving.
In fact, as soon as I handed over that… bedava to the Great Guru, we all felt quite forlorn. The further we got away
from the Guru, the emptier we felt. All our hopes for better days and lives just vanished. Once we lost it, we realized
what the Guru has given us with Naam is life itself!
After all this time with the Guru, we took Naam for granted. We only experienced
the utter desolation of a life without Naam after we gave it up. Severing our connection with Guru severed our Naam and we
became broken men depleted of Naam. I am sure you noticed your husband’s empty state? … We felt miserable!
Royally miserable! We realized halfway home that a desolate life starving for Naam is far worse than any death from hunger.
To make things worse, we had hoped to be welcomed home by our womenfolk and families…”
He fell silent, and then added, “Bhen Jee, I am extremely sorry. I don’t know what happened. I guess the lack of food,
sleep and the relentless onslaught eroded our morale. I just don’t know … we have gone without food and sleep
for extended periods of time before, but nothing like this even cropped up in our minds before. I suppose we fell for
the enemy’s evil plan to divide and conquer by offering us a way out. However we will make this work to our advantage
and go back fresh and renewed and much wiser to our Gurus Service. The first
thing I’m going to do is the burn up that evil paper that I wrote up!” he paused, “If the Guru has bothered
to keep it. Perhaps he gave up on us?”
he asked me as if I knew the answer.
This answer I did know, “No, he has not given up on you and never will!”
And so a jatha of 40 Singhs, and several bibis who valued certain death beside
their beloved Guru over an uncertain life without him mounted their horses. Led by MaiJee and the Jathedaar, they rode out
singing shabads about their love for their Guru His inherent forgiving nature.
|
|
|
The next day Pita jee asked me to read
the next pauree of Jap Ji Sahib.
Amul gux Amul vwpwr ] Amul vwpwrIey Amul BMfwr ] Amul Awvih Amul lY jwih ] Amul Bwie Amulw smwih
] Amulu Drmu Amulu dIbwxu ] Amulu qulu Amulu prvwxu ] Amulu bKsIs Amulu nIswxu ] Amulu krmu Amulu Purmwxu ] Amulo Amulu AwiKAw
n jwie ] AwiK AwiK rhy ilv lwie ]
amul gun amul vaapaar || amul vaapaareeeae amul bhanddaar || amul aavehi amul lai jaahi || amul bhaae
amulaa samaahi || amul dhharam amul dheebaan || amul thul amul paravaan || amul bakhasees amul neesaan || amul karam amul
furamaan || amulo amul aakhiaa n jaae || aakh aakh rehae liv laae ||
He stopped me and said, “To best explain this part of the pauree, let me
tell you a saakhi:
Once Dhan Guru Nanak sent Bhai Mardana Jee into
a city with a gemstone and asked him to sell it to the highest bidder. Bhai Mardana Jee first went to a street vendor
who was selling gol guppas and spicy samosas and showed him the gem. Amazingly beautiful, the flawless stone shimmered and
sparkled with inner fire. It completely captivated whoever looked at it. As though they had peered into a mirror where dreams
come true, they could almost feel their innermost longing about to be fulfilled (but
then what else would you expect from a stone which Guru Nanak had touched?!)
The
vendor stared into its magnetic magnificence. Unable to tear his eyes away from its spell he offered, “I
can give you five plates of gol guppas, two trays of spiced samosa and fresh
milkcake made this morning by my mother, wife and daughters own hands.” Bhai Mardana Jee smacked
his lips appreciatively, but moved on; quite sure that he could get a better price!
Then he showed it to a merchant wearing expensive
silks heavily embroidered with gold threads. Extremely impressed, the merchant
rubbed his hands together, his fat fingers bulging with gold rings. He reached beneath his outer garments, took out his purse
and counted 5 gold coins holding them out on his pudgy palm to pay for the Jewel. When Bhai Mardana Jee hesitated, the merchant
tempted him with three shimmery lengths of colored silk, one vermillion, one azure, and one saffron colored. Smiling in admiration,
Bhai Mardana Jee, commented on their luster but shook his head and turned to go. The merchant called after him, “Take these
two fine embroidered robes as well,” but he kept walking.
Next he entered into a market where the shopkeeper,
quite busy with customers, impatiently asked him, “Yes, what can I do for you?” Bhai Mardana
Jee showed him the gemstone. The shopkeeper took him aside. He stared at the
precious stone for a long time forgetting all about his waiting customers. Tearing his eyes away with a sigh, he looked at Bhai Mardana Jee with new respect and put his hands together with a slight bow, “Sadhu Jee, I
can give you whatever you want. Take anything. Please just name your price!” Bhai Mardana Jee looked around at the
variety of goods. Telling the shopkeeper that he might be back after getting an appraisal for the jeweler, he moved on.
He noticed a Jewelry store just up the street
and stepped inside. The Jeweler, an extremely spiritual man, had an eye not only for precious quality of stones but for the
precious qualities of people characters too. He respectfully bowed to Bhai Mardana Jee and motioned his assistant to bring
a comfortable seat and some refreshment for their esteemed guest.
When shown the gemstone, the jeweler lost all
his bearings and muttered, “Such beauty! Is it possible that such beauty exists?” The entrancing
aspect of both the stone-bearer and the stone itself enchanted him. Focusing
on the beauty within himself, he involuntarily closed his eyes, catching a glimpse of his soul. A vision that he had spent
his entire life pursuing had been instantaneously revealed (by Guru Nanak)!
He opened his wonder-filled eyes in awe and
looked from Bhai Mardana Jee’s face to the gemstone and back again several times. After several minutes of complete
silence, the Jeweler clapped his hands. His assistant came forth and he whispered some instructions into his ear. The assistant
left returning with a chest which he set in front Of Bhai Mardana jee. The Jeweler pulled a key from beneath his robes and
unlocked the chest. He opened it and placed 100 gold coins in front of Bhai Mardana Jee.
He murmured, “O Sadhu Jee, I bow to you and to your Guru who has made you so exquisitely
beautiful. This gemstone, just like you, Sir, is priceless. I give you this as merely as token for the unparalleled pleasure in glimpsing the enticing treasures within it. I cannot, nor could anybody in this
world, possibly place a value on this gemstone.”
After a pause Pita Jee spoke again, “That is the kind of priceless-ness Guru Nanak writes about in this pauree. Dhan Guru
Nanak ended his previous pauree saying that the one who gets the gift of WaheGuru’s praises, Naam, becomes a “king
of kings”. In this pauree he says that
these kings don’t just bury their priceless jewel in their treasury and sit on it; rather they actively trade it! And
the tools they trade with and the traders they trade with become incalculable too. The currency of this commerce is love!
The traders of Naam speak love and by speaking this love over and over, they become immersed in the immeasurable love of priceless
WaheGuru!”
Pita jee stopped and closed his eyes. A jeweled teardrop formed in the corner of
his eyes and slowly trekked down his rosy face. How radiant he looked! His face glowing with Naam imparted an allure of ras
and rang, a sweetness and glow that I had not noticed before. Perhaps he had finally found the Naam that he had so passionately
discussed all his life.
I squeezed his hand joyfully and whispered, “How did this happen?”
He whispered back, “Bheti, dear sakhee, when one loses something and regains it, it becomes doubly precious!”
I held his hand in both of mine and told him, “You look so wonderful today. Oh Pita Jee, how could I ever repay
you for your love and … priceless wisdom?” He smiled and whispered, “Sakhee, praising the priceless
me is a good start!” We both burst out laughing treasuring the moment; for the house had become too quiet after my husbands’
departure.
Pita Jee continued, “Dhan Guru Nanak lists some who sing such priceless praises.
He also says it’s simply not possible to fully describe WaheGuru. Ultimately only WaheGuru knows the greatness and depth
of WaheGuru and ones who say otherwise are considered foolish…. unlike your wise Pita Jee who knows it all!” we
laughed again and he told me to the read the rest of the pauree.
AwKih vyd pwT purwx ] AwKih pVy krih viKAwx ] AwKih brmy AwKih ieMd ] AwKih gopI qY goivMd ]
AwKih eIsr AwKih isD ] AwKih kyqy kIqy buD ] AwKih dwnv AwKih dyv ] AwKih suir nr muin jn syv ] kyqy AwKih AwKix pwih ] kyqy
kih kih auiT auiT jwih ] eyqy kIqy hoir kryih ] qw AwiK n skih kyeI kyie ] jyvfu BwvY qyvfu hoie ] nwnk jwxY swcw soie ] jy
ko AwKY boluivgwVu ] qw ilKIAY isir gwvwrw gwvwru ]26]
aakhehi vaedh paath puraan || aakhehi parrae karehi vakhiaan || aakhehi baramae aakhehi eindh || aakhehi gopee thai
govindh || aakhehi eesar aakhehi sidhh || aakhehi kaethae keethae budhh || aakhehi dhaanav aakhehi dhaev || aakhehi sur nar
mun jan saev || kaethae aakhehi aakhan paahi || kaethae kehi kehi outh outh jaahi || eaethae keethae hor karaehi || thaa aakh
n sakehi kaeee kaee || jaevadd bhaavai thaevadd hoe || naanak jaanai saachaa soe || jae ko aakhai boluvigaarr || thaa likheeai
sir gaavaaraa gaavaar
~~~~~
At the back of my mind, I kept wondering (especially when the kids were acting
up!) how it would have been if I had gone to battle. It would be such a great feeling to be doing something as noble as defending
the Khalsa Panth. I pictured myself first fighting bravely and then pleading to the Guru to remove my husband’s name
from that dreadful bedava.
One day, after my chores were done, I sat down thinking how wonderful it would
be if my husband could somehow make it back to describe what had happened after he rode away. Of course he had no chance of
coming back, but the Guru is mysteriously great…
I felt my eyes drooping and I decided a nap would serve me well. I nodded
off.
After several minutes of dozing, I woke from my slumber, and discovered myself
suspended a couple feet above my body! I thought this must be the dream that my husband often talked about finally happening
to me. I looked at my floating self with wonder. My body seemed to have no physical substance. Instead a soft radiance
gave it shape. I found my clothes most interesting. They seemed to be woven with threads of colored light. I wondered whether
our village tailor could manage such a design!
I hovered idly musing for a few moments until a sudden chilling thought entered
my mind. Could I be dead?!! I panicked! What about my children? They would be orphans. The instant I thought of them,
I found myself looking down on them. I could see them sitting with other children for lessons. They listened drowsily, struggling
to stay awake, as their teacher while swatting absently at flies, droned on and on about some historically great, but boring,
personage.
I felt very confused. How had I gotten here? Had I truly died? Instantaneously
my body appeared beneath me. I looked closely and noticed it heaving up and down with each breath it took. Then I perceived
a slender silver thread linking my transparent radiant body to my sleeping body. I relaxed, deciding that I still lived.
I had no idea what to do though -
I tried to remember if Pita Jee had ever mentioned anything like this before. Immediately I saw Pita Jee below taking his
afternoon nap. He slept soundly as I watched. Aha! Suddenly I dawned on me. I realized that I traveled by thought
in this form.
|
|
|
