Highlands Ranch High School
- Mr. Sedivy -
Highlands Ranch, Colorado

Q: Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail. And with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. All of this made him what?

A: A super callused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

International Toilets

A Canadian, a Russian, and an American each bought a toilet. The Russian bought a wooden toilet, the Canadian bought a marble toilet, and the American bought a musical toilet.

The next day the Canadian came back to complain and said, "I want a refund. Every time I use the toilet, I slip off."

The day after that the Russian came and complained, "I want a refund. Every time I sit on the toilet I get splinters in my bottom."

The following day, the American came to say, "I want a refund. Every time I sit down, I hear my national anthem and have to stand up."

If you enjoy toilet humor, please check out:
Mr. Sedivy's Italian Toilet Tour

Bizarre Book Titles
(These are actual books - check them out!)

1. Mated With A Clown; 1884
2. Our Lady of the Potatoes; 1995
3. The Joy of the Upright Man; 1619
4. My Invisible Friend Explains the Bible; 1971
5. Follow Your Broken Nose; 1950
6. The Great Pantyhose Crafts Book; 1982
7. Pernicious Pork; or, Astounding Revelations of the Evil Effects of Eating Swine Flesh; 1903
8. Thirty-six Reasons for Believing in Everlasting Punishment; 1887
9. 1587. A Year of No Importance; n.p.
10. Life and Laughter 'midst the Cannibals; 1926