My Story: I planned a special family trip for new years to mall of
america and invited my friend and her girls to come with us (she was a good friend for the past 1 1/2 years that lived 2 hours
away and we emailed and im'd daily, sometimes many times a day and got together every few months just us and the kids). This
was the first time my H was with us where it wasn't a big social party type thing. The whole trip my H and friend (she was
currently seperated and D papers were filed) flirted with each other, I let them know I was angry about it and they both told
me I was being stupid. When we got back I figured it was over and lesson learned, never again would we do this family thing.
My friend especially was mad because I ruined the trip with my jealousy and was outraged that I would think so badly of her,
did I really think she was after my H. We worked it out and things seemed normal again.
Little did I know that they continued their flirtation in email and
one week after we got back from the trip they spent the night together when my H was out of town on business and staying at
his dad's place (his dad was in florida
for the winter). My d-day on 1-10-03 started when I accidently saw an
email from her in H's box over his shoulder. I stood my ground until I had full access and saw their plans for that night.
They both denied anything happened and I actually believed that, although it was still bad enough as it was and in my mind
it was an A. The next 2 months my H was inconsistent with his remorse and there was alot of fighting and blame throwing in
both directions.
My H went to a 4 day intensive christian counseling that he set up
on his own. This led to my second d-day on 3-19-03 when H called me to
confess to all in the A including sex with my friend, and the shock that this was actually his second A the first being 6
years ago. We have been rebuilding since then, but it's been slow going.
I found this board a few days after my first d-day and it was truly
a Godsend and my best source of support and encouragement. I am in awe of all the wonderful people here who so willingly give
of themselves even as they struggle with their own pain. This board belongs to us all and I'm grateful to be a part of it.
Hugs to you all, cl-jade
